College is a whole new world of adventure that many high schoolers are eager to dive into once they graduate. A new place to explore on their own, freedom and fun just waiting around the corner, and of course brand new friends and people to meet. The college is chosen and the bags are packed, and finally you are off to a new start. The transition from high school life at home to college is big for some, especially when it comes to truly being on your own for the first time. This is when new relationships blossom, and for many these people will be in your life for the long run.
I remember being a freshman and immediately creating long-lasting memories with my track teammates. This was my first exposure to new people and experiences in college, and being around them every day made college seem like a blast. Of course there were ups and downs and fights and grudges, but without some of my best friends, and family back at home, I’m not quite sure how I would have made it. Now that I am a senior, I have never felt closer to my friends than ever before. Through the past four years we have been through hell and back and now more than ever we need each other. College is no walk in the park. Without a solid support system, there will be times where being away from family and being hit left and right with constant stress will tear you down.
Students have jobs, are involved with clubs or sports around campus, and simply just study day in and day out. The pressures of succeeding and moving forward effectively in this stage of life can be overwhelming and even crippling. SFGate.com states that, “More than one out of three college freshmen across the globe – 35 percent – show symptoms of one of the common mental-health disorders, according to new research published by the American Psychological Association.” Depression and anxiety is the top two disorders that are affecting these students, and may even continue to afflict them later in their college years. Despite having counseling services (student health services) available on campus, not all colleges have this luxury and only about 15 to 20 percent of students seek help according to HealthDay.com. As if it isn’t hard enough to focus on yourself and move forward with so much weighing on you mentally and physically, your closest friends are more than likely experiencing it too.
I went to counseling my sophomore year of college after some unforeseen circumstances, and pushing from a few friends. I ultimately hit a wall that seemed unbreakable, and my grades dropped, my sports performance suffered, and I isolated myself from those who cared. I was running myself thin with sports and even a job at that. It seemed like I was even setting myself up to fail, and I avoided talking to my family and friends because I didn’t want to bring them down or even know what I was going through. Even after that bleak time I never truly realized how much my closest friends were suffering as well. Once you find solid ground and start to develop into a better person for you, you move towards finding your own happiness and finding ways to get through the next semester. Seeking help is never a bad thing, and letting your friends know this is very important. Once you support and care for yourself, being there for your loved ones is the next step.
Supporting a friend during hard times may be challenging. Some don’t realize that they need to talk, and some think that working even harder will push their feelings to the side. If counseling (whether it be on or off campus) or talking to family is not an option for them, being a shoulder to cry on or someone who sits and listens is always a good way to go. If you notice your friend’s mood change, if they have impulsive behaviors that are dangerous, or even if they seem a little “off” to you, try and approach them in a calm manor. If they are not in danger of harming themselves or others, encourage them to speak up or even seek treatment. It can be hard at first, but hopefully they will open up and be honest about how they feel. Even sharing your own experiences whether they were there for them or not can help them seek help themselves.
“Between 2009 and 2015, the number of students visiting counseling centers increased by about 30% on average, while enrollment grew by less than 6%, the Center for Collegiate Mental Health found in a 2015 report. Students seeking help are increasingly likely to have attempted suicide or engaged in self-harm, the center found. According to Time.com, “You never truly know what someone is going through until you ask. Don’t pressure them to come to you, but rather check up on them and even go a little further to reach out and just be there.” In short, students need to help students.
Faculty, and parental guardians need to help students. American students need to help international students. And friends need to help friends. Support your friends through treatment. Support them and be there for them when they think nothing else and no one else is there. Battle fatigue may hit your both hard, but sticking together will make you stronger. You will build each other up and conquer the struggles of college life that come your way. College is hard, and will put you through many tests. But being there for each other will surely make the college experience a lot easier and worthwhile.