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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

The Ugly Truth Behind Breakups

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Adelphi chapter.

While breakups could be one of the most emotional hurdles for a girl, I can assure you that it is not the end of the world and you will get through it. Everything happens for a reason, and while the pain from the breakup will sting for some time, it won’t last forever.

If you are anything like me, you probably sit in your room, cry and hope that he will change his mind. Unfortunately, the chances of that happening can be slim. My mom once told me that no man is worth your tears and that crying is a form of weakness. Never let a man see you cry because in doing so, it gives him power over you and a chance to play with your emotions.

Breakups are hard, and every girl is going to experience  heartbreak at one point in their lives. The important thing to remember is to learn how to handle one in a mature way.

  1. Don’t Plot Out Your Revenge!

    The last thing you need after experiencing a breakup is to give him a reason to talk badly about you to his friends. By plotting revenge, you are giving him that reason. Do not destroy that car that he loves so much or run around telling all his friends and family his secrets and embarrassing events that occurred while you two were together. Don’t be that spiteful ex-girlfriend that everyone thinks is going crazy over a guy.

2. Don’t be clingy!

    There’s nothing more embarrassing for a girl than texting her ex a million times begging him to take her back while he decides to ignore her instead of hearing her out. Boys can be stubborn, and once they set their mind on something, it is hard to convince them to change it. The same goes for him changing his mind about the breakup. Instead of harassing him with millions of texts have some dignity, accept the breakup, and move on.

3. Don’t Isolate Yourself!

    Nothing is worse than going through a breakup alone. Family and friends are always there to support you and to give you some advice. If you ever need a pick-me-up, call your girls and have a girls’ night while you drink wine and talk about your exes. The beauty of girls’ night is that what happens at girls’ night, stays at girls’ night. It is specifically designed to be a safe space where you can say whatever you want without remorse. So instead of crying yourself to sleep every night by yourself, go out with your friends, enjoy the privilege of being single or simply call them up if you need a pick-me-up.

4. Time Heals Everything

    The pain does not last forever, and there is nothing that time can’t heal. As days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months, you will realize that the pain you felt in your heart will fade. Don’t jump into a new relationship because rushed relationships have a habit of not lasting long. Give yourself time to heal rather than find a rebound guy to fill that hole in your heart. If you get yourself a rebound guy, you will unknowingly be putting yourself in a cycle of heartbreaks.

While breakups can be hard, sometimes they happen for the better. There are other guys out there just waiting to give you all their love so don’t dwell on the past. Instead, learn to love yourself first before you give your heart to someone else. Every person who walks into your life is either a blessing or a lesson; boys have the tendency of always being a lesson. We do not need a significant other to be happy. While being in love can be one of the greatest experiences you go through, there is no better relationship than the one you have with yourself.

 

 
Hi, my name is Gabby. I am currently a Junior at Adelphi University. I am a psychology major and I wish to pursue a career in child psychology. I am originally from Staten Island, New York. I am also on the Equestrian team at Adelphi. I am a coffee fanatic and enjoy yoga. I enjoy having movie nights and staying in. I love everything Disney and my favorite Disney princess is Ariel from The Little Mermaid.