Whether it’s a few days, 4 months, 13 years or 23 years, when someone dies it is never easy. When you lose someone close to you, family or not, it’s really rough, especially when that person was someone who has done so much good in their life.
My aunt passed away around 4 months ago. It was not easy to say goodbye and I still think of her every day. My aunt was one of the first nurses at the Stony Brook Cancer Center and was a nurse for a large part of her life. She helped so many people and was a light in the lives of everyone she crossed paths with. When a person falls ill, everyone comes together to do their best to help them get better. But sometimes, their best isn’t good enough and God has other plans in mind.
When it was finally time to say goodbye, it was one of the single hardest things I have ever had to do. I replay the very last moment my aunt was with us again and again.
You may ask yourself all sorts of questions like “why them?” “why couldn’t they just get better?” but the important thing to always keep in mind is that they are no longer in pain. Although it sounds stupid and you have probably heard it over and over again, it’s the truth, they are in a better place.
This article has taken me several months to write and I still cry every time I come back to it because the loss of someone is a void that can never be filled. You’ll continue to look at pictures of them that you never knew existed and revel in the way things were. You’ll take new family photos, and something will just be lacking. You will look around the table at birthdays and holidays and something just won’t feel right because it is not right, someone is missing. There is no fix, no getting over it, and as much as you may want it, there is no going back in time. You can only keep the wonderful memories made in the time you had with them and remember those memories forever.
But, good can come out of the bad. You realize how precious time with the people around you can really be. The week following my aunt’s death was the saddest week I have had in many years but was also the most eye opening. Seeing my family come together and comforting each other brings a smile through the tears. While losing someone is one of the saddest thing in life, it brings people closer than they have ever been.