Whether you’re sick of seeing the same old guys in all of your classes and around campus, you’ve outgrown the whole dorm/cafeteria/student lounge scene or you’re just looking to expand your dating pool, getting off campus to meet someone new is a great idea. Still, figuring out where to start can be a bit overwhelming, especially if you’re used to meeting guys strictly in the confines of campus. Next time you’ve hit a bit of a dry spell in your usual on-campus spots, change your M.O. and try some of these hot spots.
1. The Park
Tip number one for meeting your next man: You’re not going to find someone sitting on your couch watching endless reruns of America’s Next Top Model and Project Runway. Get out, get moving, enjoy the fresh air and get that cute guy’s attention! Hitting local parks or other rec spaces can come with way more benefits than simply staying fit. Showing off how much fun you have when you’re in motion can definitely catch the eye of a cutie.
How to Get His Attention:
First, know when to approach someone. You wouldn’t want someone walking up and hitting on you the second you finish an intense run, so don’t sidle up to a guy as soon as he’s finished hitting the trails. Instead, wait until he’s started a cooldown walk or finished a trip to the water fountain to strike up a conversation.
The nice thing about approaching someone while you’re at the park is that it provides you with the perfect conversation opener in a relaxed, casual setting. Comment on what the other person is doing: ask what his fave routes to walk or jog are or give a quick compliment about his choice of activity. If you’re feeling extra flirty, invite him along next time, ask him to show you how to maximize your time in the area, or turn the tables and offer to show him what a killer hiker/biker/rollerblader/whatever you are. Not only have you started a conversation, but now you have a first date in place. Score!
2. The Nightlife Scene
This is the classic rom-com scenario: guy meets girl (or girl meets guy) in a crowded room after eyes just happen to meet across the bar. Why not make it work for you? What’s more, most college towns are full of bars and restaurants that are made to cater to college crowds, often with different drink or food specials if you show an ID, wear your college gear or simply show up! “Not only is it a great way to get out of your campus’s bubble, but let’s be honest: older guys are way better than your average collegents!” says Kelsey Mulvey, a senior at Boston University. The odds couldn’t be more in your favor in this scenario.
How to Get His Attention:
Be bold! Meeting and talking to guys at a bar requires most of us collegiettes to step a bit out of our comfort zones. It’s always nice to have your girls with you to keep you from doing anything too risky or dangerous, but very few guys will approach a girl surrounded by a crowd of her five best friends. Brush up on your bar etiquette and make sure you know what to do once you’re approached!
For those of you collegiettes who feel a bit bolder, consider reversing the roles. If a certain cutie has been catching your eye all night, don’t be afraid to send a drink his way as well. It can work both ways! Still not convinced? HC got college guys to tell all when it comes to their thoughts on dating and the bar scene.
Do a bit of Googling, talk to friends or peruse campus publications or flyers and find out if bars or restaurants host any special event nights for college students. Some places will hold blind or speed dating nights, offer special pricing on game days or run other special deals to attract more college students to their venue. Take advantage of any special days or events, as these could up your chances of connecting with someone.
Be sure to keep the usual safety tips in mind as well, as the bar scene can be dicey if you’re not careful. Make sure you only drink what you’re sure you can handle and that you’re following all the usual rules you’d stick to when going out with your gal pals.
3. The Bus or Subway Stop
We all have to get from point A to point B somehow––why not use the commute to your advantage? If nothing else, a flirty conversation on a bus or subway trip makes things more fun and interesting while you’re stuck in the same vehicle. Who knows what could happen. Travel can spark a powerful romantic connection!
How to Get His Attention:
Use your destination as something the both of you have in common. If you’re commuting between campus and an apartment complex, ask the guy you’ve got your eye on how he likes his unit, what classes he’s headed to campus for or something else related to where you’re headed. If you’re headed off campus elsewhere or into a city, ask what he’s most looking forward to doing or seeing or if he’s got anything fun planned with friends or family.
If you’re still having trouble striking up a conversation, use the scenery flashing by the window as a starter. Comment on how much you love the food at a restaurant you’ve just passed, an event that’s being held in the park nearby or how excited you are to try the new business about to open, for example. All of these can make easy parlays into a potential date as well!
4. Your Church, Synagogue or Other Place of Worship
Dating might not be your first priority at venues like this, but many faith-based institutions also have a large emphasis on socializing and building community with the people who gather to worship every week. Meeting someone through a church, synagogue or other faith-based group can be a great way to find someone with whom you probably share a lot of common values and interests, something that can be particularly important if you’re looking for something more serious or long-term.
“I met my boyfriend at church,” says Christine* a senior at the University of Saint Thomas. “I could see him visibly agreeing with a lot of the same points that resonated with me, and [I] started talking to him about it after the sermon was over. Instant connection!”
How to Get His Attention:
Use those common threads again! Ask if any points from the service resonated with him, how long he’s been attending or coming to wherever it is you’ve met or if he has a favorite service or faith-based leader. If he mentions a particular time he likes to attend a faith-based event, offer to join him next time!
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5. At a Service Event
Nothing is cuter than a guy giving up his time for a good cause. Volunteering shows he cares, and hopefully signals that the two of you share a common interest in whatever you’re both volunteering for. Meeting guys and feeling good at the same time? Super cool. Plus, have you ever heard of a volunteer event where everyone is completely silent? Didn’t think so. You’re practically forced to talk to the people you’re with, making conversing and getting to know a person a snap.
How to Get His Attention:
First, find an opportunity to help with an issue you’re excited and passionate about to make sure you’re showing the true you. Remember: it’s the cause that needs to come first and foremost. That being said, think about approaching someone during a lunch break or right when things start wrapping up for the day.
Keep your eyes peeled for opportunities to work with the dude of your dreams while you’re volunteering as well. Offer to assist for the same task he’s just signed up for, or ask if he minds having an extra hand. If you’re feeling ultra bold, ask him to help you reach something above your head or help you lift something that requires multiple hands. The two of you will be bonding over your cause in no time!
6. A Friend’s Place
Use that wingwoman to the max! Expand your search for guys to wherever your friends are located. Whether it’s a friend’s off-campus apartment, her place of work or another off-campus place she haunts regularly, ask for an invite to join or meet her there the next time she goes. The more connections and feelers you put out, the better your chances for meeting someone will be. The bonus of using friends is that they (hopefully) know who you are, whom you’d be good with and what you look for in a guy. They can be a great resource when it comes to helping you find your next fling, especially if you have your eye on someone who’s already in your circle.
How to Get His Attention:
Let your friends know that you’re looking for something, be it a hook-up or a serious relationship. Then, ask for invitations! Your friend is hosting a killer party? Ask for an invite. Your best guy friend mentions one of his buddies needs a date for his frat’s winter formal? Ask for an introduction. Don’t be afraid to reach out to a diverse group of people as well. More people simply mean more possibilities!
The key is to let your friends know what you’re looking for, and then to not be shy about asking for further opportunities or introductions. Your friends want to be there to support you, so don’t be afraid to use their resources to the fullest. Just make sure you’re willing to do the same when it’s their turn to ask!
7. Off-Campus Job or Internship Fairs
Once you’ve delivered a dazzling resume to all the employers you’re interested in, what’s left to do? Chat up the other internship and job seekers, of course! Show off those people skills in person to not only impress any potential future bosses who may be observing the crowd, but also to expand your connections and meet new people as well (including your potential next Mr. Right).
How to Get His Attention:
Ask questions! People love to talk about themselves. Even better, these kinds of events lend themselves to simple conversations that can easily lead to deeper questions. For example, classic convo starters like, “What field are you interested in?” are quick ways to jumpstart a conversation.
Another bonus of trying to meet someone at these kinds of events is the structure of the occasion itself. Many of these situations often include time to mingle or socialize, providing you with the perfect opportunity to practice those flirting skills.
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8. A Coffee Shop
Consider public spaces like coffee shops or coffee houses almost like a bigger, more grown-up version of your campus library. Not only can you accomplish some much-needed studying, see some great live music, do some people-watching and enjoy the occasional scrumptious pastry or two, but you’ve also widened your potential dating pool to include all kinds of endearing, smart patrons like yourself!
How to Get His Attention:
Use the same approach you would if you were back in your campus library. Set up camp near a cutie and flirt, flirt, flirt! Significant glances and prolonged eye contact can convey a message while staying totally silent––a must in any study zone. A killer library-chic look never hurts either!
If you’re ready to up your coffee shop dating game, dare to raise your voice a bit and ask whoever you’re eyeing if he’d be up for some group studying/research/reading next time. It’s the perfect no-pressure first date. The best part? It’s totally free!
9. A Museum or Art Exhibit
One of the best things about tons of college towns across the country is that they’ve got great galleries and museums of all shapes and sizes that are usually fairly close to campus. Do a bit of basic research (either on Google or by talking to professors and other on-campus resources) to find out which shows and exhibits are happening in the area. Then, embrace your inner artist and go explore for an afternoon. You never know who might be discovering the same amazing artifacts or artworks with you.
How to Get His Attention:
You’ve got two great options for chatting up anyone who catches your eye in this setting: use your expertise, or take it as a chance to learn something new. If you happen to be at an exhibit that aligns well with your academic or personal interests, toss out an interesting fact or opinion about what you’re looking at as a conversation starter. If you’re not as familiar with the subject, speak up and ask a question.
“I went to a gallery off-campus once and had a great conversation with another student that was looking at the same photo I was,” says Shannon Bliss, a sophomore at the University of Missouri-Columbia. “Turns out the person I asked had just about as little of a clue as I did about what we were looking at, but we had fun guessing what it was supposed to be.”
Whether he’s an expert at what the two of you are viewing or is just as confused as you, you’ve at least broken the ice!
10. On the World Wide Web
You’ve seen the commercials: one in five relationships now originate online. Good news: there are tons of dating apps and websites designed specifically for us collegiettes!
How to Get His Attention:
If you’re looking for a cyber romance, up your virtual presence. Check out some of the most popular online dating sites, like OKCupid and Match.com. Apps like Tinder are also gaining in popularity. These sites and apps are making online dating easier than ever. One profile and a few mouse clicks could help you find your next boyfriend way more easily than spending all those days and nights searching on campus.
As always, be a bit cautious when meeting an online match for the first time. Let a friend or roommate know what your plans are for the night and when you expect to get back. Have a plan in place in case the date goes south. Hopefully you’ll have an amazing night, but it never hurts to be a little cautious just in case.
Once you get off campus, you’ll realize there are great guys just waiting for you to notice them. Whether it’s at the park, a friend’s house or on the computer, your next date could be right around the corner from school. Be brave, be nice and, most importantly, be yourself. You never know who’s waiting for you!
*Name has been changed.