When I first joined James Madison University’s Her Campus chapter in September of 2023, I knew nobody’s name. Months into being an active member, I still knew nobody’s name. But when I was elected President in March of 2024, I suddenly knew who everyone was in a matter of weeks — and not just their names, but also what they looked like, whether they were active members, and the type of articles they often wrote. I realized that, as President, I could change Her Campus at JMU to give every member that type of experience, fostering opportunities for the women in our chapter to form friendships with other members, something that seemed nearly impossible in my previous experience.
As part of my mission to encourage bonding, I came up with the idea for a date function, something our chapter has never done before. We decided to make it a Valentine’s mixer between JMU’s Her Campus chapter and two other student orgs on campus: Planned Parenthood Generation Action (PPGA) and JMU’s chapter of Spoon University. Members of all three clubs were invited, along with their dates.
TBH, I was actually really nervous to do this. I’d never hosted a date function before, let alone one in my own apartment. For a solid two weeks before the date function actually arrived, I lay awake at night, anxious, with thoughts swirling around my brain. What if barely anyone shows up? What if it sucks? What if it’s super awkward? What if my date is miserable?
When the day finally came for me to host this date function, I pushed all of these thoughts to the side, knowing that an event like this could give members the opportunity to meet people and form lifelong friendships — an opportunity I never got during my time as a member. And after months of planning, my dream turned into a reality. Here’s how it went.
11:00 a.m.: Deep clean room
Assuming my date, who was also my yearlong situationship, was going to spend the night after the function, I deep-cleaned my entire room. I washed my sheets and dirty clothes, made my bed, and organized all of the clutter that was taking over the space.
11:30 a.m.: 7Brew & Target run
I still needed to grab a few things for the date function, so I was in desperate need of a last-minute Target run. But first, I obvi needed to stop by 7Brew, Harrisonburg’s go-to drive-thru coffee shop, first. Knowing caffeine can exacerbate my anxiety, I got an Orange and Lime Fizz sparkling water rather than anything caffeinated. Then, at Target, I got the last few things I needed, as well as a Valentine’s Day cup that I spotted and had to buy.
1:00 p.m.: Her Campus Meeting
Just because it’s the weekend doesn’t mean I’m relieved of my President duties! I met virtually with a new member to show her how our website works and how to submit articles.
1:30 p.m.: Everything shower & skin care
IYKYK…
3:00 p.m.: Lunch
I know I should’ve eaten earlier, but when I’m anxious, I can’t eat! While I wasn’t really hungry, I knew I had to stomach some food so I could make it through the day, so I had some leftover pasta, taking breaks between bites to blow up heart-shaped balloons.
3:30 p.m.: Finish setting up decor
Thankfully, I’d set up most of the decorations the day before, so I didn’t have a whole lot of setting-up to do. My roommate, Carmen, could tell how stressed out I was, so she generously helped me blow up more balloons and set up some last-minute decor.
4:00 p.m.: Move furniture
I was really nervous about having some of our stuff out during the party, like our rugs, cat scratcher, TV, and mirror, so I moved a ton of furniture to our second floor and pushed the remaining items against the wall.
4:30 p.m.: Makeup & hair
I was running so behind by this point. I’d wanted to start my hair and makeup hours prior so I could just have it done, but it took so long to do everything else that I didn’t start my hair and makeup until about 3 hours before I had to be ready. I tried doing fake lashes and eyeshadow but inevitably just gave up and stuck to my typical makeup routine and curled my hair.
7:00 p.m.: Plot twist
With just over an hour before guests started arriving, I found out that my date wouldn’t make it to my date function in time. Interestingly enough, I had a gut feeling that this would happen when he told me weeks prior that he was going snowboarding on the day of the function, but he had reassured me multiple times that he’d be there with plenty of time to spare. Welp!
All of my friends knew I’d invited him, so I was honestly really upset and frustrated. While he said he could still make it, but he’d arrive two hours after the party’s start time, I wasn’t into it — I would be embarrassed having my date show up so late. I held back my tears as I finished my makeup and continued getting ready. Thankfully, my roommates got all dressed up so they could be my dates instead, despite previously not wanting to come.
7:45 p.m.: Fit check
This is what I was most looking forward to. With the theme of our date function being Valentine’s Day, I expected guests to show up in their finest red, white, or pink attire. Personally, I’d managed to snag my dress at the mall months prior to the function, and was told by multiple people that it was such a “me” dress. Once I put the dress on — as well as my boots and necklace — I immediately felt so much better.
8:00 p.m.: Make punch
While our function was BYO, I wanted to have mocktails available for our non-alcohol-drinking guests, so I took a bottle of strawberry lemonade and some lemon-lime soda, mixed it with some edible glitter, and voila: a beautiful (and glittery) mocktail!
8:15 p.m.: Exec arrives
I asked our Executive Board to show up a bit early to the function. (That way, the party would already feel like it was in full swing when the guests first started arriving) They all arrived in the cutest outfits! We all pregamed the party together, jamming out to music as we waited for the rest of the guests to arrive.
It was off to a great start, but at the same time, I was reminded of the reality of hosting a date function, and how it isn’t always as peachy as it seems. Mid-conversation with my friends, my would-be date kept FaceTiming, calling, and texting me, saying he could still show up later, despite knowing I’d wanted him to arrive at 7 p.m. It was obviously too late at that point, so I pushed my feelings aside and instead did my best to enjoy being with my friends.
9:00 p.m.: Guests arrive
About 30-40 people ended up showing up in total, absolutely dressed to the nines in Valentine’s Day colors. I got so many compliments on the music I was playing, which was mostly 2000’s throwbacks and some current pop hits as well.
I made my rounds and did my best to chat with everyone as the guests talked and danced. I was really happy to note that people complimented my decor, which made me realize how much my hard work had really paid off. I was honestly so relieved to see everyone having a good time, since it was something I was super nervous about.
10:00 p.m.: Time for photos
Mid-party, I made sure to take photos with my Executive Board and some other friends, while also being the designated photographer for everyone else.
11:30 p.m.: Guests start to head out
TBH, people left a lot earlier than I assumed they would, and I was lowkey glad. I was nervous people wouldn’t leave until 1 or 2 a.m., and felt so relieved when everyone slowly started to head out around 11:30. I said my goodbyes to everyone before it was finally just my roommates and me again.
12:00 a.m. Pizza!
I was going to clean and move our furniture back after everyone left, but by this point, a bit of relaxation was way more compelling. Roomie Carmen ordered some pizza and cookies to satisfy my cravings, and I ate a few slices of pizza and debriefed with my roommates before heading to bed.
At the end of the day (literally), while I was still absolutely pissed off at my situationship, I somehow felt like I had a better time without him there than I would’ve had if he was there. The entire night went better than I expected, and I was thrilled to see all my plans to encourage bonding actually paid off. But all this said, I honestly felt so relieved that it was finally over.