Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
vanessa and xander in the ultimatum: queer love
vanessa and xander in the ultimatum: queer love
Culture > Entertainment

The ‘Ultimatum: Queer Love’ Filming Locations Are Picture Perfect

The Ultimatum: Queer Love has been my new reality TV obsession and is the latest in Netflix’s rollout of reality dating shows with wild twists just in time for Pride Month. The show follows queer couples who have given each other an “ultimatum.” One wants to get married, or they’re calling it quits, but the other is hesitant. So to test the strength of their relationship and see if they’re ready for marriage, they break up and date other people. Ultimately, they leave engaged, newly single, or with new love. What could possibly go wrong? 

We’re about to find out, and the next four episodes were just released. Now, there’s no doubt the drama is to die for, but what about that beautiful resort? I swear, I would go to one of these shows just to be able to use the pool! If you’re like me and are curious about where The Ultimatum: Queer Love was filmed or are maybe even planning a copycat vacation of your own, I’m here to break down all the filming locations from the new season. 

Resort location

the ultimatum: queer love

The main filming location for Episodes 1 to 4 has been the Coronado Island Marriott Resort & Spa in San Diego. The resort has three pools on the property and is right on the ocean. Talk about romantic! According to Travel Weekly, the price is steep: $370 to $634 for a standard room

Trail marriage apartments

The establishing shot for the couples’ apartments is of Vive on the Park, a high-end apartment complex near Balboa, a beautiful historical city center. According to apartments.com, the rent for a mere studio here can be more than $2,000/month! The rooftop is also where Tiff and Sam have their sushi takeout date in Episode 5. 


Ocean Beach

vanessa and rae in the ultimatum: queer love

This has been a popular date spot with the producers, with Vanessa and Rae coming here in Episode 4 and Xander and Yoly in Episode 5. Later, Rae and Lexi come here as they attempt to reconcile, an iconic scene cutting between their tearful apologies and a group of seagulls eating trash in Episode 8. The establishing shots of the dock entering the ocean separate Ocean Beach and South Mission. This area is known for its laid-back, hippie vibes. 

Dog Beach

mildred and tiff on the beach in the ultimatum: queer love

Mildred and Tiff came here for a date at the beginning of Episode 8 with Mildred’s dog Zoe, who I must say is seriously adorable. You can see the sign in a background shot, and it’s a popular spot among local dog owners.

Date night spots

Gaslamp Quarter

The group night out in Episode 4 occurred in the Gaslamp Quarter, one of the iconic San Diego spots perfect for a bar crawl. The name also adds another layer to Lexi’s gaslighting accusations against Vanessa that I couldn’t look away from!

Bay Ink Tattoo

I don’t think there’s a more iconic opening scene than Vanessa getting her nipples pierced on her date with Rae, which took place at Bay Ink in La Jolla. The shop has three locations throughout Southern California. If this struck you as a perfect idea for your next queer date night, the shop does actually have fantastic reviews on Yelp.

Shake and Muddle

Xander and Yola’s dinner date occurred at Shake and Muddle, a modern cocktail bar in Chula Vista. They specialize in flavorful cocktails and local seafood, and it is a local favorite to come and watch the game. 

Barrel and Board

This spot was my favorite of the dates. Look at the ambiance! Barrel and Board is a charcuterie board and cocktail spot in Hillcrest lush with Parisian decor. What I find super awesome about it is its women’s and POC-inspired cocktail menu — no wonder sparks were flying between Lexi and Mal!

Beeside Balcony

The Beeside Balcony, where Aussie and Mildred had their date, is a hidden gem on the San Diego coast specializing in meridian cuisine and cocktails. Hopefully, the ocean views were enough to distract from the awkwardness of meeting Aussie’s best friend Mo.


According to their website, this cocktail bar is an “urban oasis” in Hillcrest and was the site of Sam and Tiff’s date in Episode 4 and Rae and Lexi’s in Episode 8. The spot is well recognized for its ambiance and is actually LGBTQ+ owned and operated. I found it to be a thoughtful touch from the production team and a great way to promote local queer-owned small businesses. 


This adorable sushi bar is where Yola and Xander had their date in Episode 5, and it specializes in bento boxes and crunchy tempura. Based on pictures of the takeout boxes from Yelp, this is likely also where Tiff and Sam got takeout for their rooftop date in Episode 5. 

Breakfast Republic

This elevated breakfast spot is a favorite among southern California natives, known for its campy decor and flowing mimosas. Personally, though, I think breakfast is too early to meet the parents, as Rae did on her date with Vanessa in Episode 5. 

Centrum Park

This local park is where Vanessa and Xander go in Episode 6, and it’s revealed that Xander is still secretly in contact with Yoly before eventually hugging it out. It’s right across the street from the trial marriage apartments.  

Hot Air Balloon Ride

vanessa and xander in the ultimatum: queer love

The hot air balloon ride Vanessa, and Xander shared in Episode 6 really took expectations to new highs. While I can’t identify exactly which company they used, the area appears to be in Del Mar, where hot-air balloon rides are a popular tourist attraction.

Ketch Grill and Tapas

Aussie and Sam came to this upscale small plate spot with an ocean view to meet Aussie’s brother. I found this to be one of the most interesting introductions in the series, as Aussie opens up about their relationship with their mother. 

Mavericks Beach Club

This bar is located right on the Pacific and was the site for the group hang-out in Episode 7. The 15,000-square-foot property turns into a club at night.  

Baja Betties

Aussie and Sam came to Baja Betties in Episode 8, a casual Mexican joint known for their margaritas, and has been open for nearly 20 years. This was one of the most shocking dates in the series after Aussie’s dramatic exit and breakdown in the parking lot.

Alexa Wilson is a culture and entertainment writer in the Her Campus National Writers Program. She writes articles based on current events in pop culture through the lens of Gen Z. This includes celebrity news, TV, film, and literature. Beyond Her Campus, she works as managing editor for Loyola Marymount University’s The Lion, an online publication covering Los Angeles. She oversees the scheduling and communication of an 18-person student team and fact check and formatting articles. She is also the treasurer of the LMU Women in Politics Organization, a student advocacy group promoting young women's involvement in politics. She also oversees planning and budgeting for fundraisers and events. In her free time, Alexa enjoys doing pottery and going to the beach. Her favorite guilty pleasure is watching Below Deck with her friends.