Harvard Mother Orchestrates Son’s Virginity Loss

There are many things to keep in mind when it comes to preparing for college, and while pending virginity loss may be a source of social stress to some, it generally isn’t (and shouldn’t be) enough of a problem to get proactive about. But one Harvard bound boy may be unknowingly turned into a “cool college kid” thanks to a creepy addition to the Craigslist “casual encounters” section earlier this week, made by none other than his own Mother.

The plan, explicit in more than one way, includes an arranged meeting two innocent bystanders and several sex positions, concluding with gentle release of the clueless pre-collegiate so that he will “have the confidence to date other girls once he’s there [at Harvard.]”

As distrubingly entertained as we are by this woman’s wordy post and freakish description of her son’s handsomeness based on body mass index, we certainly hope that the young women browsing cyberspace in search of extra cash saw this one for its extreme sketchiness.