If you’re escaping the winter blues by scrolling through TikTok like me, chances are, you’ve come across “The Feminine Urge” TikTok trend on your For You Page. Rumor has it that the trend originally started in 2004, and now, it’s back and gaining popularity across Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok. While Twitter versions of “The Feminine Urge” trend feature short, quippy takes like this one, TikTokers have taken things to a whole new level by adding in Taylor Swift’s “Nothing New (Taylor’s Version),” a heart-wrenching song that features fellow sad girl Phoebe Bridgers. I can’t tell if it’s the cold weather approaching or the fact that Blondie, Phoebe, and Adele are wrecking our emotions 24/7, but this TikTok trend has me in my feels.
At a glance, the objective of “The Feminine Urge” TikTok trend is to make a clever statement about the universal experience of womanhood — which we know isn’t a monolith — and post a video with your statement that says: “the feminine urge to…[fill in the blank].” In the trend, the “feminine urge” doesn’t have to be inherently “feminine” at all, and can refer to anything from the impulse to cut your own bangs to suddenly leaving the country to start a new life. Many creators have broadened the trend to include the “non-binary urge” and the “masculine” urge as well — so, theoretically, it’s less about stereotypes and gender binaries and more about sharing the funny, offbeat, niche things that drive you.
Although the trend was already clever to begin with, adding TSwift’s new tearjerker from Red adds a deeper layer to TikTokers’ “feminine urges.” In the trending audio, which has been used in just over 13,000 videos to date, we hear the following lyrics: “How can a person know everything / At eighteen, but nothin’ at twenty-two? / And will you still want me when I’m nothin’ new?” Tragic, if you ask me. While we could dive into Taylor’s lyrics all day, the bottom line is that the trending audio has TikTokers in their feels, and they’re using the sound to show the world their many “urges,” from funny and sarcastic to nostalgic.
For example, @milinaslibrary is fighting the feminine urge to dump her boyfriend, prioritize herself, take a tropical vacation and live her best life. Creator @hollyjreardon is resisting the urge to cancel all of her plans so she can hang out with herself. TikToker @loumayyy is trying her hardest not to be hyper-fixated on Blondie’s stolen scarf, and @clare_mclaughlin has the “feminine urge” to resist seasonal depression by pretending to be a Jane Austen character. (Personally, I support all of these urges). Other versions of “The Feminine Urge” trend are more lighthearted — like this version from @earthrry, who just wants to eat a pickle in peace. As you can see, the trend can be interpreted in a variety of ways, but most videos have an undertone of humor and a tinge of sadness.
While “The Feminine Urge” trend has evolved greatly since its birth in 2004, its humorous appeal and relevance remain the same — especially for members of Gen Z, who love an opportunity to flex their comedy skills, get in their feels, fangirl over Taylor Swift, or all three simultaneously. Whether you’re resisting the urge to remember every ex who wronged you or you’re dying to drink iced coffee in the middle of autumn, an urge is an urge — no judgment here.
Like TikToker @mayak246 says in her version of the trend, how are we supposed to focus on homework when Taylor and Phoebe ripped our hearts out in four minutes? I’m with you, Maya. The truth is, sometimes there’s only one way to handle your sad girl feels, and that’s channeling your energy into a TikTok trend. The next time you’re looking for a TikTok trend to hop on, pour yourself a hot beverage (a sad girl must-have), check out a few examples on the app, and give “The Feminine Urge” trend a try. Warning: feelings may arise.