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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SJSU chapter.

Being single in college can be exhausting when surrounded by romantically experienced people and active in that aspect of their lives. It enormously pressures people to rush certain things and jump into something they may not be ready. There is this preconceived notion you should be sexually active or in a relationship by a certain age.

However, this could not be farther from the truth. Everyone should have the freedom to do what they are comfortable with when they are ready without being judged or belittled. Growth and maturity are not linear, and it is different for everyone. Being single in college can be a wonderful experience. 

Since so many people are new to being independent, it is easy to feel lonely in college. It is normal to desire a relationship and crave intimacy, but it is not needed to complete you as a person. It is easy to focus on what you do not have in your life, but focusing on what you have can help you thrive in your personal life.

Instead of wasting all of your energy being sad about your love life, you can focus your energy on other meaningful things in your life. The platonic relationships you build with others can be so incredibly fulfilling. Finding the people you click with and genuinely enjoy spending time with is key. My best friends are my entire world, and being able to spend so much time with them makes me so happy and content.

Everything should flow when it’s the right person, and even doing the smallest things is a good time. Family can also be a fulfilling aspect of your personal life. Spending time with immediate and extended family is so important. For me, spending time with my mom is one of my favorite things to do. Just living life with her every day brings me so much joy and comfort in life. 

Other than focusing on your interpersonal relationships, it’s even more important to focus on yourself. Spending time with yourself and learning about yourself is incredibly important. Having days in your week that you designate for taking care of yourself is crucial. This can be anything that helps you destress and relax. Some examples are going out for coffee, going to the grocery store, organizing your space, sitting in the park, reading, picking up a new hobby, etc. By spending time with yourself, you will start to learn more about what you enjoy, the type of people you want in your life, your passions, how you perceive the world around you, and more. It is almost like dating yourself in a way, which is such a special thing.

The most important thing is making sure that you are not relying on anyone but yourself for your happiness. You should show yourself the love and care you deserve before allowing someone else to come into your life and share those things with you. 

Instead of feeling sad or less-than because you are single and inexperienced in college, start feeling powerful and liberated. There is no shame in not settling until you find what you want. College is a time to figure out who you are and what kind of person you want to be. You will thrive and better yourself until someone worth your time comes along. You do not need anyone to make you complete because you are enough. 

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Hi I'm Ava and I'm a second year at San Jose state! I am majoring in kinesiology hoping to get into the medical field. I am from pleasant hill, California and I am 19 years old. I am passionate about reading and writing. I also love all things related to photography.