What makes a romance novel romantic is not just the storyline, but the little details that go into it. While the characters have their faults and conflicts, they are living romanticized lives. Mundane details are no longer ordinary or boring but are what make a scene special. My friends always laugh at me because no matter what book I am reading, I always self-insert myself as the protagonist. I think that while part of me loves the idea of being the main character, the other part of me loves how romanticized their lives are, and I want to experience that. The more I read my romance novels, the more I realize that I do not have to self-insert myself just to experience a romanticized life: I can appreciate the same elements in my life that I appreciate in my books.
As I write now, I notice the sunlight gleaming through my curtains, and the softness of my blanket. I’m not saying that I narrate all these details in my head as you would see in a novel, but I am more aware of them and it makes me extra grateful for the life I am living. During times of stress and conflict, I try to take a step back and look at the small things that make me happy, whether it’s the way I arranged my decorative pillows on my bed this morning or the warm latte I am sipping out of my cup. If it’s worthy enough to be written in a book, it’s worthy enough to notice and think about. Even outside of romance books, the key to romanticizing one’s life is your mindset, whether it’s about routine or the way you view the world. Noticing the small details that make your everyday life special are what add the romantic aspect. For example, Lara Jean in To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before loves baking, and what makes reading those scenes so special is her attention to the way the ingredients are splayed out, the garnishes sprinkled into her dough and batter, and the overall environment of the kitchen. Her kitchen scenes helped jumpstart my romanticizing journey as the author, Jenny Han, took an activity I don’t think about doing much and made it seem like the most special thing in the world just by its details. I now try to look at the little details everywhere to make me realize even small moments can be special and romantic.
I try to pull something I love from each main character I read about and apply it to my life. In the beginning of Winter quarter, I read The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood, and one thing I loved about the main character Olive was that she had a lot of passion for her school work. Reading about her helped me become motivated to do my homework and put in late nights even when I didn’t want to because not only was I focusing on romanticized details like the colors of my pins or study set up, but I was trying to adopt the positive mindset of the character. By doing this, I am not changing who I am, but I am finding ways to gain motivation or see areas of life in a new light that I initially had a negative attitude towards.
The more I read romance novels, the more I find new ways to romanticize my life. I am currently reading Beach Read by Emily Henry, and it is more serious than your typical cute romance novel with banter, but the story is so engrossing and touching. As it tackles the idea of “happily ever after,” it’s helping me with my outlook towards imperfections and not everything being what you thought. The more I read romance novels, the more I come to accept life’s details, challenges and unique moments. A romanticized life does not have to be perfect, it just has to be beautiful in its own way.