As someone currently going through their senior year of college, I get a lot of questions about the future. Do I know what I want to do after I graduate? Am I nervous or excited? Is it weird knowing I’ll finally have a bachelor’s degree and hypothetically be done with my education? I have conflicting feelings on many of the answers, but rather than thinking about the future, I’ve actually been spending a lot of time considering the past.
It’s not that I necessarily miss those times, as I was an actual walking disaster freshman year, but there are aspects of it that I wish were more present in my life now. I know it was only a few years ago but putting so much time and thought into who I used to be makes me feel absolutely ancient. And yet, there are some definite points I would go over with my freshman year self if I were given a chance.
- Take Care of your basic needs first
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If I’m imagining myself having an actual conversation with mini-me, I would definitely give this first point some emphasis. This could be with volume, tone, or perhaps a light slap across the face followed by the obvious but necessary reminder that the four basic human needs of water, food, shelter, and clothing are not up for debate. Yes, coffee and tea may have water in them, but that doesn’t equate to it being water. No, brief and exhaustion-fueled naps are not a replacement for a night’s rest. And as much as you may have a sugar tooth and it is perfectly ok to indulge, Insomnia Cookies does not serve as a satisfactory substitute for actual nutritional meals.
So, as much as it may be fun to sit back with friends and spend nights watching terrible movies and half focusing on schoolwork, sometimes simply going to bed is the better option. It’s more than possible to enjoy your time and have a productive social life without ignoring what your body quite literally needs. The adjustment of leaving home and having to learn these things isn’t necessarily hard, it just takes some time. However, I also wish that the phrase “basic human needs” implies these things aren’t something you can just ignore. It’s laughable to look back and think of how confused I was when I remained sick for the vast majority of freshman year. With moving to a new and (admittedly sometimes gross) location and generally just not having any level of self-care, it makes sense.
- Talk to your professors
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Looking back, all of these little talking points and bits of advice seem oh so basic. Obviously, as a student in college, it would make sense to communicate with the people teaching me. Not only is it their job, but many of them are actually interesting and lovely not only as teachers but also as human beings. I know that your anxiety levels spike with the thought of saying anything to a professor beyond the mandatory “here” during attendance, but it will actually benefit you in the future.
Actually, not having more conversations with my professors has been one of the bigger regrets from my earlier years, as it would mean I wouldn’t be struggling with letters of recommendation or finding someone to go to for research and academic wisdom.
- You don’t have to deal with people you don’t want to deal with
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Yes, you should always try your best to be polite, but sometimes, people don’t really deserve that. As someone with basic but fairly developed empathy skills, you are able to sense this quickly, and so continuing to go out of your way to be nice or inclusive even though they might not be at all pleasant, just isn’t necessary. It will tire you out and result in slight drama, something that we both know causes you undue stress.
It is okay to actively say no to people if they want to hang out, but you have no interest in doing so. It isn’t being “mean,” it’s being honest. For example, if some honors boy comes into your room consistently throughout the school year to cry on your shoulder and smear an unfortunate amount of snot on your husband pillow, it is perfectly acceptable to either tell him to leave, buy you a replacement pillow, or demand payment for acting as his impromptu therapist. During sophomore year, when you move out of your dorm and feel more capable of refusing others, you will realize how much it exhausted you.
- It’s okay to not know what you want to do with your life
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I wish I could confidently say this is the case because in the future, you will have fully figured yourself and what you want to pursue out. However, that isn’t quite the case. I’m still learning what I enjoy as well as what I would be good at. Finding a suitable career and life’s goal is an ongoing process rather than something you declare in the form of a major at the beginning of freshman year and commit to forever.
Academics and the track they set you on making it seem that simple, but it really isn’t. Coming into college as undeclared not only isn’t a crime but was also a necessary part of our education. You didn’t know what you wanted to study, and so it wouldn’t have made sense to declare something just for the sake of having an answer when people asked you what you were majoring in. Just give yourself some patience and time; things will work out.
- Enjoy all that free time you have
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You have no idea how lucky you are. Immediately after writing this article, I will be driving to my second job. Don’t get me wrong, I do have free time. However, it comes in small and very valuable chunks that I feel pressure to take advantage of. Growing up has the advantage of people viewing you as more responsible, but unfortunately, this is paired with actually having to deal with those responsibilities. Even freshman year, you liked to keep yourself busy with clubs and classes. However, I also miss the freedom that comes with having no job and no obligations beyond making new friends and dealing with an unpleasantly early class schedule.
Overall, I actually really liked my freshman year. I look back on it as one of the most straightforward and genuinely enjoyable years of my life. But I still made some questionable decisions, as did everyone else. I had a good time, but if I could go back in time, I would definitely make some changes.