Ladies, we’ve all been there. You’re just hanging out with your guy friends – in a dining hall, at some party, on the Slope in mid-April – and everything seems fine… until the elephant in the room raises his trunk and blares out, “Damn, Cornell girls are ugly.”
“The smarter the girl, the uglier she is… generally speaking,” says Ryan* ’11. He stresses the importance of mitigating factors, but maintains that his roommates’ pillow talk is ensconced in the strictly superficial realm of bang-ability.
Joe* ’13 agrees with Ryan’s roommates: “On an attractiveness scale from 1 to 10, the average public university student is probably like a 7, while, here, on average, [she] is closer to a 5 or 4.”
“After spending enough time here, guys change their scales,” Joe says. “For most guys, something is better than nothing.”
Welcome to the Cornell Scale. And may I anticipate and second your resounding “Oh, please.”
“Cornell girls are no different than any others,” says Sarah* ’12. “We’re just as susceptible to feeling the need to superficially achieve the external perception of being attractive. Until our cultural norms shift, girls are always going to try to comply with this ideal, unless they have the confidence and self-assurance to realize otherwise.”
Translation: There will always be girls at Cornell who are taking the time to look good. So why are guys so harsh in their judgments?
“Cornell women are more objectified by merely looks rather than how attractive they are as a person,” Cate* ’12 says.
Dr. Ruth Peters, a clinical psychologist and regular contributor to Today, recently wrote about the importance of teaching children about “body diversity” to escape the perils of “looksism,” or “the tendency to perceive social acceptability based upon how a person looks.” She cites research implicating even teachers in the phenomenon. Studies show that teachers judge more physically cute children as more intelligent and socially apt than plain or less attractive kids, even when other data – grades, attitude reports – were identical for both.
Already we see the effects of looksism in preteen girls. According to the data compiled by Dr. Ruth, 75% of girls 8 to 9 years old say they like the way they look, while only 56% of 12 to 13 year olds agree. And while this dramatic decline in the numbers is startling for girls, almost none of it pertains to boys.
“Take a male athlete – let’s face it, there’s a lot of them here at Cornell,” begins Cate. “He has a great physique – the abs, shoulders, biceps – you name it…and the face, is, well… ehhhh. But he must be talented to make it to D1 varsity, right? Women look past the sub-par face and the fact that he may not be that great of an athlete based on the attractiveness of dating an ‘athlete.’”
Are we simply more willing, more often, to overlook little things like appearance when assessing a guy’s attractiveness?
Lauren* ’12 thinks the Cornell Scale is just as valid for men: “The pool of attractive men is definitely smaller than what one would find at a typical college. Girls are forced to lower their standards for what they are looking for in a man. For 20-year-olds who are very focused on physical appearance, what Cornell has to offer is definitely not satisfying,” she says.
Fortunately, not all students have such a bleak outlook when it comes to finding love at Cornell.
“I would say we’re not overall a very attractive school, but there are always gonna be some diamonds in the rough and usually people end up happy. It makes us focus more on personalities and compatibility,” Jake* ’11 says.
Cate agrees. “I wouldn’t call it lowering our standards, but I would say being realistic about who you think is compatible for you,” she says. “We can dream and lust all we want for someone who we know isn’t going to reciprocate feelings, and while the chase might be fun for a little while, it will only leave all parties exhausted and frustrated. So rather than waste that time chasing, why not find someone who really is right in front of us? Like the cute guy in your government class or that treasurer of the club you’re a part of. Maybe I’m the eternal optimist, but I think there can be someone out there for you if you really are looking for it at Cornell.”
Easier said than done, though, isn’t it? How do we know that guy we’re lusting after will never look at us that way unless we try? Is “giving up” on that guy we think won’t reciprocate equivalent to admitting defeat to a society that seems to value its women solely based on their looks? Or, is our unending search for the perfect man as derriere-backwards as the collective mindset we criticize our Cornell boys for?
Jeff* ’11 points out that others may be overlooking the real problem – the weather. “Cornell doesn’t do anything to help the attractiveness – it’s cold, rarely sunny, and everyone is always busy so it may be difficult to devote much time towards beauty. Even the prettiest of girls have the potential of taking a step down in attractiveness by attending Cornell. And even a small step down could mean a leap down in confidence, which is more visible, even in physical beauty, than one would think.”
*Names have been changed.
Sources
*Cate ‘12
*Jake ‘11
*Jeff ‘11
*Joe ’13
*Lauren ‘12
Ruth Peters, Ph.D http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/19618047/ns/today-parenting/
*Ryan ’11
*Sarah ‘12