Let’s face it, collegiettes™, we’ve all passed by someone and said, “Oh wow, he/she is a ten!” We are all guilty of judging or rating someone based on looks, personality, or a combination of both.
But how do these rating scales differ from men to women? What determines who is labeled a ten, versus who is a five or six? Here’s what He and She had to say about it:
He Said:
In a classic scene from Seinfeld, Jerry and Elaine determine that 95 percent of the population is undateable. How, then, does one determine the desirability of a given prospect. First, one must distinguish between two entirely unique rating scales: dateability and, as it’s been termed, “drillability.”
The dateability of a girl is calculated through a relatively complicated formula which will vary based on the individual values of the rater. For instance, my own personal system might be boiled down to something along these lines:
D=i(a+s+p²)+z
In the above formula, desirability is equivalent to intelligence times the sum of physical attractiveness, sense of humor and personality squared. “z” refers to the degree to which a girl likes Led Zeppelin. Obviously, this formula is far more precise than any actual rating system, but it conveys the relative importance of various characteristics.
Of course, the traits which men value will vary on an individual basis.
“She doesn’t have to be a model, she just has to be chill,” says junior Jaritt Davis. “Being a model doesn’t hurt though.”
As Jaritt says, much of a girl’s dateability is based on how “chill” she is. It’s important for a girl to simply enjoy herself in a casual setting.
Along these same lines, a girl’s outlook on the world is of great importance. Nobody likes to spend much time with a downer.
“I just like a girl who’s upbeat,” says Manny Orero. “The happier she is, the happier I am.” This is a sentiment which is common in the male perspective. Happiness itself is attractive.
In fact, many non-physical factors contribute to the attractiveness of a girl. Often, the way a girl carries herself can contribute to or detract from how good she looks. As senior broadcasting major Jeff Markowitz puts it: “Having a good personality makes a girl attractive – the two can’t be separated.”
This is true at least with regard to the dateability of a girl, but what about drillability? The nature of the latter ensures that the criterion for rating are much more superficial. “Dan” who declined to offer his last name for fear of vilification, offered this explanation: “It’s all about looks, it has to be. I think about it in terms of how early I’d be willing to take them home. Midnightis the tops, 6 a.m.not so much.”
Nearly all rating systems are at least partially based on physical attraction. Unfortunate though it may be, the first information we have about a girl is how she looks. Our interest, then, tends to be first derived from their outward appearance. Still, that’s not all there is. As junior English major Ian Merriman says: “Hotness draws me in, but it has no bearing on how I feel about a girl. I would date a female gremlin if I could talk Ulysses with her.”
As Ian acknowledges, attractiveness has its place, but it certainly isn’t anything. A girl can be a 10/10 or a midnight, but that alone does not earn them a place within the 5% of society which is dateable.
She Said:
Rating a guy isn’t as simple as checking them out, giving them a number, and moving on to the next one. There is a lot to consider when rating a guy, and each rating means something different.
For example, just the other night my roommate and I were discussing some of the guys we know and whether we thought they were “cute” or “hot.” But what determines whether a guy is bring-home-to-mom material or strip-right-where-he-is-standing material?
For each girl it is different. What one girl thinks is cute, another might not, says junior psychology major Erin Crise.
“Personally I like more athletic guys, but still, if their face is unattractive then I’m like ‘oh no’,” Crise says.
Physical features, however, are not the only factor that determines a guy’s looks. The way a man dresses adds to how attractive he is to women, but this is not as simple as it sounds.
Women don’t want a man that looks like he is trying too hard. A man should be effortlessly put together. If a man dresses well then it shows women that he cares about his appearance and wants to be successful, which in turn adds to his rating.
“If you dress like a slob, I’m probably not going to have sex with you,” says junior English major Veronica Kelly.
We also rate men differently depending on whether a guy is dating material or simply just a hook up. To be dating material, women definitely have to be attracted to a guy, but they also have to see some potential.
“If their face is not the greatest, we make a way to justify that they are cute in our minds,” says sophomore psychology major Becky Brennan. “For a guy, it’s like, if she’s not hot, she’s not hot.”
Women look at more than just ‘oh, is he sexy?’ Brennan, specifically, says she often wonders if they have a good future ahead of them.
“If I get knocked up, are you going to be able to take care of me?!” Brennan thinks to herself.
With women, it is not all about looks, though.
“You definitely go by what they look like first, but if you feel like you are talking to a brick wall then you’re done,” Crise says.
The ability to make us laugh also comes into play when we rate guys, because after all, laughing is the best calorie burner.
But how do women actually rate guys? We have all heard our guy friends give women numbers based on their looks, but if personality, intelligence, and looks all go into how women rate men, how do we do it?
“I think some girls do [use numbers,] but not as much as guys seem to,” Crise says. “Our rating system is more categories.”
These categories range from adorable to cute to hot.
Most often, if women describe men as adorable, it tends to mean they are friend material. Cute is often dating; we can see some potential with the guy. And hot is used to describe someone we would engage in sexual activity with.
Women also use comparisons to rate how attractive a guy is.
“Personally, when I see a guy, I compare him to a celebrity,” Brennan says.
We see men and initially think, ‘oh he’s cute!’ but then later decide, ‘oh, he isn’t as cute as that one,” but if we get the chance to interact with these guys and their personalities shine through, that will definitely affect how attractive they really are to us.
“I’ve never met any [women] who use numbers,” Kelly says. “Although maybe I’ll start, it’ll keep me more organized.”
She might have a point. If personality plays a major part in how we rate men, does that mean, depending on the day, a man can be more or less attractive to us? Maybe a straightforward number system is the way to go, or maybe not.