“There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn’t have your number in it.”
“Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?”
“You come here often?”
Though mildly entertaining and a fun dare to give to a friend, pick-up lines are nothing more than tacky, creepy, and unsuccessful ways to land yourself a date. Ironically, the only place you can use one and have even a slight chance of scoring a second date happens to be on national television. No, I’m not talking about watching the boys of Jersey Shore pick up grenades; I’m talking about the season premiere of The Bachelor!
This season brought about some of the craziest, most comical introductions yet. From hats to horses to Granny Apple Smith, the twenty-five starting ladies of season sixteen were clearly all after the same thing: the number of Ben Flajnik’s hairstylist… and the first impression rose.
Purposely walking past the door to stroll by a man a second time in case he didn’t fall for you ‘at first sight’ is a trick you can only get away with on The Bachelor. Should you or I try such a stunt at a basement party then we better expect some funny looks! If your greatest pleasure from watching the first glimpse into Flajnik’s love story was the opportunity to harshly critique each woman’s facial features and choice of prom dress, you can bet you weren’t alone. But instead of turning this into a blogging bash fest (who am I, Jenna?!) let’s dissect some of the most memorable first impressions of the night and see what we can learn to improve our own first seven seconds with bachelors.
Dress to Impress
Hats off to Holly, the 34-year-old Kentucky native, who proudly rocked an obnoxious Derby hat to plant her seed in Ben’s memory. As anyone will tell you, looks shouldn’t matter, but they do play a significant role in attraction. You wouldn’t want to strike up a convo with Mr. stained T-shirt and 700-o’clock shadow, so no excuses if ratty high school sweatpants don’t bring all the boys to your yard.
Bold Move
It’s so simple and says so much, yet only truly confident women (and when I say confident I mean without the liquid courage) can pull this smooth move off. Blonde bombshell Anna may not have scored herself a rose, but definitely made a Bachelor first by walking straight past Benny boo, coy smile and fixed eye contact in tow, and into the mansion. Even I, the at home viewer in sweatpants on the couch, stopped mid-popcorn crunch to let out a “say whaaa?” Ben may be past playing games, but introducing yourself using only body language is sure to amp up the fun and mystery. Silence can be very, very golden.
Horsin’ Around
Nothing beats beauty and brains more than humor! Last but not least to arrive was Lindzi, who trotted in on horseback. Talk about an entrance! Her gimmick was clever, witty, and if not almost impossible (how did she talk the producers into that one!?) and succeeded in winning her the coveted first impression rose.
Another upbeat first impressionist was Emily, the epidemiologist. Emily showed off a fun gangster side by throwing down a rap to Ben. Acting a little silly lightens the mood for both parties and creating comfort early on sets a nice and easy to converse mood.
To Grandmother’s House We Go
We thought we were about to witness the oldest contestant yet when gray-haired Sheryl, crutches and all, hobbled out of the limo. But then out behind her came Brittney, the one who will now always be known as cute and sweet for bringing her grandmother along. A good idea to get someone to like you is by adding sentimental value to the conversation. You spend your weekends at the SPCA? Your idea of a fun night out is using up all of your extra punches on sandwiches and feeding them to the H-Burg homeless? What a great way to assert your kind heart right off the bat.
Gossip Girl
The one thing you should never do when meeting Mr. Right Now for the first time? Unleash your catty girl drama. Sure, we all have our insecurities, but putting them on display to your guy is a total turn-off! Blogger Jenna and seemingly bi-curious Monica didn’t hit it off on the right foot and let every other girl in the house know so. Naturally, both ladies got a rose. But real life doesn’t have ratings. Save the drama for behind the scenes!
When approaching someone for the first time, always remember to have fun! Flaunt your assets, smile, be cool, calm, confident, and if you’re feeling it, bust a rhyme. Do whatever it takes to get yourself that rose!