Welcome Back Loves
A very compelling story for you today – one that I’m sure you and every other right-minded girl at this school has been curious about since the first winter on campus.
I know you’ve seen it happen. And I know that every time you walk past, you think the same thing that I do – WTF. What I am referring to, of course, is that dirty, smelly corner that groups of smokers seem to relish in. You know what I’m talking about. The brave souls that sit under the ramp up to Towers patio where that nasty heat vent is – puffing on a cancer stick and socializing like it’s the best spot to hang out on campus. Now, maybe I’m just naiive, but I could never quite understand the appeal behind this activity. So, being the curious person that I am, I decided to do a little exploration.
I ventured out of my warm and cozy dorm room and down to the corner next to the stairs. The first thing I discovered? There are about 3,000 cigarette butts in about a 6 foot square radius. Impressive if you ask me. Some are ground into the cement as if they’re some sort of abstract art, while others are partially buried in the mulch garden directly in front of the sitting area. AND the best part – most are thrown through the grate in the wall into the source of the dirty heat. Well, this seems logical, right? Let’s make the already pretty disgusting, smelly, probably straight up toxic air that comes out of this vent even dirtier by throwing the cigarette butts into the mix. Then of course, there’s all the trash. Evidence left behind would make you believe this is the prime spot to enjoy your coffee, your lunch, or a cool refreshing beverage in the fifteen degree weather. Then there’s the ground itself. Not only is it covered with trash, it’s also got a solid inch of dirt and grime for you to sit your little butt on as you enjoy your cigarette.
Now let’s talk about the source of this dirty heat. In case you haven’t had the opportunity to travel into the depths of the tunnels in the Quad – let me explain. Under the Quad, there is a system of tunnels that connect all of the buildings in the Quad, as well as the garage that is under Towers. This is where the furnaces for all the buildings are and also where all the trash is stored from all of the residence halls until the garbage man comes once or twice a week to pick it up. So – you do the math. Trash + heat = dirty heat. I don’t know about you, but this doesn’t exactly sound like a pleasant combination. Maybe there is some wonderful, glorious secret about the dirty heat corner that I am overlooking. And if there is, please, enlighten me. Otherwise, I will continue to be baffled by this utterly strange phenomenon.
You know you love me,
Xoxo, PITT GIRL PROBZ