Are you tired of waiting around for him to notice you? Regardless of the many years of Disney’s social conditioning, it’s time to enter the reality that is the modern dating scene. Prince Eric from the Little Mermaid doesn’t really exist, girls, and you’re not really a princess. For all the other areas of society that women are dominating, why should we shy away from approaching a romantic endeavor with a similar gusto? There is no reason why we can’t ask him out. Yes, I know you’re probably making up reasons such as fear of rejection, and society’s insistence that he should chase you. But we all should just relax because the truth is that he’s not approaching you for the same reasons. If we wait on every guy we notice to approach us, we might as well join a convent.
In order to really understand how men would like to be approached, I hand selected 10 gentlemen to question. And yes, these are exactly the kinds of guys you want to date. They are smart, successful, funny and beautiful. I asked them, “Do guys want to be approached by women, or is it too emasculating?” All of the guys said they are on board if it’s done the right way. Here’s a wrap up of what they said:
-A girl putting herself out there, even being a little aggressive is very attractive, because guys are used to having to be the aggressor.
-Any kind of extra attention makes it obvious to us that a girl is interested.
–Every guy I know, as well as myself, are huge advocates of women making the first move instead of waiting for the guy.
So how do you do it? Here are a few helpful tips that will hopefully encourage you ladies to make the first move!
1) Wear your favorite outfit- In your first few attempts to get his attention, definitely wear something that looks good on you. He will appreciate it, and you will feel more fearless when approaching him.
2) Be yourself- A man’s radar for sincerity is incredibly keen. Guys like when girls know who she really is. Men know when girls are pretending to be someone they’re not.
3) Be confident and not indifferent- Ladies, I know we love to complain that guys always fall for the crazy ones, but that’s no more true than men saying we love to fall for jerks. Those ‘crazy girls’ aren’t genuine from the start, and when their ‘true colors’ come out, of course they seem crazy. Don’t approach a guy and then be a jerk, because then he will see you as a challenge.
4) Don’t come on too strong- Guys like being approached, but don’t be a freak. Being overly aggressive and desperate are not attractive. Approaching a man is about letting him know that you’re interested, not about completely making a fool of yourself. If you don’t know how to not come on too strong, avoid the 3 D’s: Ditzy, Drunk, and Desperate. I think these speak for themselves.
5) Read his cues- If he’s making eye contact regularly, smiling, answering your questions and throwing questions back at you, he’s probably interested. Guys usually will not keep a conversation going if they’re not interested. He is definitely into you if he throws in some light physical contact.
If you use these tips, then the worst that can happen is he isn’t interested. But don’t get distressed. Now you can move on, and you know what to do for the next time. I wish you all, the best of luck with leaving the Disney fantasy and joining reality and realizing that the guy doesn’t always have to be the one to ask!