I have to admit I am a college student still dating her high school sweetheart. Is it as terrible as everyone says? Am I giving up my “college years”? Absolutely not, because we have learned how to make transitions in our own lives while still holding on to each other.
The main reason high school relationships do not last in college is because people do not know how to handle transitions. The transition from having a curfew to being able to do whatever you want. The transition into going out. The transition into joining a sorority or having other new responsibilities. Living on your own. I’m not going to tell you that my boyfriend and I have it mastered because we definitely have been through our share of fights, but we have learned to be much more understanding and supportive when either of us come to a turning point in our lives.
1. Know what you want, and what you would want if you were single. If you were single would you want to join that sorority? Then do it. Years from now, whether you are together or apart, you never want to say you didn’t do something you wanted to do because of your significant other. If it bothers your boyfriend, explain to them its something YOU want to do, and he has to trust you. Want to study abroad? Do it. If it is someone worth waiting for, they will wait for you. If they complain about you “leaving them”, nicely explain that if you do not go then you will resent him for it, and you will. Try to understand why it bothers them then explain to them why it is important to you, whatever it is. I’m not saying be immune to your significant others feelings, because there are definitely things that they have a right to be bothered by. But your relationship should build you up, not hold you back.
2. Communicate – If there is something new you want to do, talk about it. The worst thing you can do is go behind their back and hope they don’t find out-they always find out.
3. Keep and make good girl friends. I cannot stress this enough. Yes, your boyfriend is, and should be, your best friend. However, he should not be your ONLY friend. Have a life besides your boyfriend, and you will appreciate him more.
4. Bring your boyfriend around your new friends.Life is 100 times easier when your boyfriend and your friends get along. You can all do things together – kill two birds with one stone. However, do not always bring him around; girls’ nights are crucial to life.
5. Don’t over do it.Space is very important in relationships in college. Just because your boyfriend can stay over every night, does not mean he should. When it gets to the point where you feel like you are practically living together – back up. Give each other time to miss each other, and when you are together will be so much more special.