Need Dr. Drew relationship advice but don’t have the sensationalistic drama to warrant TV time? Unfortunately, Real Live College Guy Ryan isn’t a reality show therapist. However, he can provide the lowdown on everything you’ve ever wanted to know about college males: how they think, act, speak and genuinely interact with the women in their lives.
I met a guy at a nearby college this weekend. We didn’t make out or hook up but we flirted and talked for a while and before I left he got my number. The next afternoon he added me on Facebook, and then later that night he texted me and asked what my plans were, but didn’t respond after that. I really liked him, and since he got my number AND found me on Facebook, I figured he must have been interested, but we haven’t talked since. I don’t want to text him or try to pursue anything if he’s not actually interested. — Technologically Confused at Tufts
Well, what are you looking for? Ask yourself because it’ll help you answer whether you should contact him.
If you’re looking for romance, I’d nix trying to get a hold of him. I’d applaud him for being ambitious and seeking you out, but look at his tactics: he got your number, sought you out on Facebook and texted you before not responding again. Either he broke his phone in the process or he lost interest in a potential booty call. That’s your interpretation at this point.
However, maybe you’re also only considering him as hook-up material, and if you’re back at his college any time soon, contacting him might not be a bad idea. He was obviously interested (even if only for a night-and-a-half) and you were too. You flirted, connected and that’s really all that’s necessary for a one-night stand—or whatever you’d prefer to call it.
If you view him in the latter light, send him a quick text the next time you’re at his school. Make sure it A) is a text (it gives him the opportunity to respond if/when he wants), B) is brief but not too brief, and C) explains who you are, where you met and where you’re planning on going that night.
This won’t guarantee that he’ll reply or that he’ll even remember who you are. But it’s worth a shot, especially if you’re looking for nothing more than a hook-up. Anything more and you shouldn’t bother.