The Olympics are all about gold, silver, and bronze, but if you ask us, the Games are skimping on a few of the most called-for awards in the athletic world. Since the London officials probably won’t take our advice and add these accolades to their Victory Ceremony schedules (those Brits do love their traditions), we’ve taken it upon ourselves to give credit where credit is due. From the overachieving, to the hairy, to the virginal, to the prodigious, these 10 Olympians are all over the map, but they do have one thing in common: they’ll probably all have medals around their necks before the next two weeks are up!
The Unibrow: Anthony Davis
It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s Frida Kahlo! Nope, it’s actually The Unibrow, 19-year-old Anthony Davis’s coveted facial focal point that’s earned him almost as much fame as his stellar one-season basketball career at the University of Kentucky. The top overall selection in the NBA draft, NCAA Tournament’s Most Outstanding Player, and late addition to Team USA, Davis and his unibrow are on the fast track to superstardom. Lest he lose any of that fame to hairy wannabes, Davis trademarked the catchphrases, “Fear the Brow,” “Raise the Brow,” and others this June. We admire his um, creativity.
The “It” Girl: Alex Morgan
Beauty, brains, and feet to rival David Beckham’s are only a few of this American golden girl’s enviable assets. The world’s gotten to know Alex Morgan really well over the last few years (and we mean really well, given February’s bare-all Sports Illustrated photo shoot in which Morgan donned nothing but a body paint bikini… and of course, rocked it). For this “It” Girl, it’s always go big or go home – she started playing club soccer at 14 years-old, much later than most of her teammates, but in 2011, 21-year-old Morgan was the youngest person to be named to the United States World Cup roster and scored two of the crucial goals during the tournament. We want to hate her for being so perfect, but she’s just too cute a collegiette not to love!
The Gender Neutral Hero: Caster Semenya
21-year-old Caster Semenya of South Africa doesn’t identify as gender neutral (she self-identifies as a woman and, after extensive gender testing, the International Association of Athletics Federations agrees with her), but that hasn’t stopped her from becoming a role model for intersex individuals the world over. After the University of Pretoria student and middle-distance runner blew away the competition at the 2009 World Championships in Berlin, the I.A.F.F. began the gender tests due to Semenya’s testosterone levels (which were three times higher than the average female). The results of the tests remain unknown to the public, but what is clear is that Semenya is no quitter; we spotted this collegiette front and center,
, during the Olympic opening ceremony, and we’re sure she’ll be front and center again when she hits the track!
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The Fastest Man: Usain Bolt
Usain “Lightning” Bolt, a Jamaican sprinter and winner of three Olympic gold medals, really does run like a flash. 25-year-old Bolt wowed the world in Beijing in 2008 when he broke the world record for the 100-meter sprint. The best part? He broke it even after spreading his arms wide like a bird before crossing the finish line, which, as we know, is not exactly the best idea when it comes to aerodynamics. But hey, the guy knew he was a winner, and we’d get pretty psyched about that, too. Since then, Bolt’s kept his arms by his side and broken his previous records in both the 100- and 200-meter sprints. His next goal: breaking the sound barrier. No, not really… but maybe?
The Hot Shot: Missy Franklin
At only 17-years-old, Missy Franklin won’t exactly be the most experienced swimmer in the pool at this year’s Olympics, but the world record-holder in the 4×100-meter medley relay is definitely the one to watch (hot shots always are!). Like America’s other swimming sweetheart, Michael Phelps, Franklin is aiming to fly out of London with seven medals around her neck. All we know is that the medals would make for some pretty cool dorm room decorations once this pre-collegiette finally ships off to school, and since she’s purposefully maintained her amateur status in order to qualify for college athletics, you might see her strolling around your campus soon enough!
The Blade Runner: Oscar Pistorius
No, we’re not talking about Harrison Ford’s role in the 1982 sci-fi flick… Oscar Pistorius is much cuter than Harrison was, anyway! This chiseled hunk of man candy is revolutionizing the Olympics this year as the first double-amputee to ever compete in the Games, having had both of his legs amputated as an infant. The sprint runner flies down the track on a pair of (aptly named) Cheetah Flex-Foot Blades, which are made of carbon fiber and are far from comfy-cozy (Pistorius ends every race with bloody and blistered stumps from the friction). Though some believe he shouldn’t have been allowed to switch from the Paralympics to the Olympics, 25-year-old Pistorious isn’t deterred; these Games are his dream come true. We just can’t wait to see that smile on screen after he crosses the finish line!
The GOAT (Greatest of All Time): Roger Federer
Roger Federer truly is the greatest tennis player of all time, and he knows it (you don’t turn your initials into a branded logo and proceed to wear it every time you receive a trophy – which is pretty much every time you compete – unless you’re operating with a sizeable ego). If Federer, who turns 31 next week, were following the rules of the tennis world, he’d probably have retired and earned himself a seat in the commentator’s box by now. Ever the overachiever, the Swiss champion instead just regained his No. 1 spot and has cemented his place in tennis history by winning his 17th Grand Slam title, more than any other player to date. Since his most recent Grand Slam win was on the grass courts of Wimbledon – the same courts being used for the London Olympics – this GOAT’s future is looking bright… bright gold, to be exact.
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The Virgin: Lolo Jones
We have no doubt that there’s more than one virgin competing in the Olympic Games this summer – we’re sure there are many – but none are so public about it as 29-year-old hurdler Lolo Jones, an American who was favored to win gold in 2008 before tripping on the second-to-last hurdle. Jones describes the continued preservation of her V-card as “harder than training for the Olympics,” but she stays strong about her plans to save herself for marriage, and her recent announcement about her abstinence gained her a 40% increase in Twitter followers. We’re guessing that her bid for gold this month will earn her more than a few followers, as well!
The Magician: Marta
Like Beyoncé, Sting, and Madonna before her, Brazilian soccer player Marta (née Marta Vieira da Silva) doesn’t need to use a last name because everyone already knows who she is. The forward’s skills on the field are nothing less than magical, proving she can bend it better than Beckham and, more importantly, earning her the title of FIFA Women’s World Player of the Year not once, not twice, but a record five times. The 25-year-old conjured up silver medals in both 2004 and 2008, but the player who many are calling the greatest of all time (do we have another GOAT on our hands?) just needs to take home the gold (and a World Cup for good measure) to seal the deal.
The Spoiler: Gabby Douglas
While many are calling this 16-year-old Virginia native U.S.A.’s secret weapon, Jordyn Wieber, the 17-year-old gymnast and longtime favorite to win the top spot at this year’s Olympic Trials, is probably calling her the spoiler. Why? Because Gabby Douglas came out of nowhere, awing the judges and snagging the No. 1 spot in the Trials after beating Wieber by 0.1 points. While a tenth of a point is hardly a decisive victory, the gymnastics world has shifted its hopes for Olympic gold from Wieber to Douglas. Douglas’s impressive skills have even earned her the nickname “The Flying Squirrel,” which isn’t exactly a super cute image (we’d rather be compared to something a little less buck-toothy, personally), but it does indicate some serious talent. Despite the spoiling during the Trials, we have a feeling Douglas will earn back any love lost between she and Wieber by helping Team USA secure some nice, shiny medals next week.
Photo sources:
http://www.webpronews.com/anthony-davis-unibrow-gets-trademarked-2012-06
http://www.diehardsport.com/2012/02/09/alex-morgan-worlds-sexiest-soccer…
http://www.news.com.au/gallery-0-1225764188015?page=1
http://snowinseville.blogspot.com/2011/11/usain-bolt.html
http://www.maxpreps.com/blogs/maxwire-national-blog/F2CCEeGyz0CeMkUBfNW7…
http://thechronicleherald.ca/olympics2012/118347-blood-sweat-and-joy-dou…
http://hollywoodtimer.blogspot.com/2010/03/roger-federer-latest-photos-p…
http://hellobeautiful.com/2520986/10-starter-boyfriends-for-virgin-athle…
http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/tM7OUInPq_4/Olympics+Day+1+Football/OvHyN…
http://www.rantsports.com/clubhouse/2012/07/02/2012-summer-olympics-spot…