As U of T students, we are constantly on the move, be it meeting deadlines or meeting friends, we’re always kept busy. Though are times when I just want to be in my own bubble, focusing on my own thing and isolated from the rest of the world, it seems like university has permanently placed me in this bubble and made it impossible to burst out of it. This has left me wondering if I’m alone in this feeling of loneliness.
If you are experiencing the “bubble,” I want to let you know that you’re not alone. Even though it seems like the rest of the world is making friends and enjoying themselves, chances are that others are making the same false judgment about you. Take a look at the following 4 statements about my university life and see if any of them resonate with you. It’s easier to unite as a community if we learn that most of our experiences are shared by others.
1. Everyone is happy and stress-free. Appearances can be misleading. My friends are going out to dinner but I have a late class and an assignment due the next day – why does it seem like other people always have time to hang out and party while I’m stuck home studying? When I actually engage in deep conversations with my peers, I’m surprised to learn that I look just as happy to them as I perceived them to be. This can mean two things: either we all have poker faces, or we should stop making assumptions about other people’s moods and experiences. It’s highly likely that someone else is observing you and making the same assumptions about your perfect and well-balanced life while you’re observing and making similar assumptions about other people. It’s best not to put any time or effort in figuring out your peers’ experiences. There’s no point in comparing yourself with them because at the end of the day, everyone has a shared experience with awfully good and bad days.
2. The hunt for a friend. Everywhere I go, I’m surrounded by big peer groups. Whether they’re walking in front of me, behind me or somewhere near me, there’s no way of escaping it – a constant reminder that I’ve yet to establish a solid friend group at U of T. I wonder, how can I join or make up a big group of friends like that? It is days like these when I reflect on my “bubble” and feel like I’m not doing enough to try and fit in. University is not like homeroom in high school, where I could meet up with the same peers for the entire year and form strong friendships with them within the first few hours of class. Remember those days? Well, now we have to put in the effort to find friends. Fortunately, I guarantee that a large percentage of the student body is going through something similar and will be highly keen on chatting with you. Consider this as a chance for us to develop or enhance our interpersonal and social skills and act courageously without any doubt. (If it goes badly, campus is big enough for us to avoid them for the next three years).
3. Fashionable peers are shaming me. As a hardworking student among many high-achievers, it seems necessary to cut down on the time it takes to dress for university by wearing the standard U of T crew neck or hoodie sweater on the daily, paired up with some sweatpants and sneakers. Not only do I get an extra 10 to 30 minutes of sleep, but I’m comfortable too! This is pretty much the uniform I see on a majority of sleep-deprived and overworked U of T students. This new “fashion style” is justified by us having no time to think about our daily outfits when we’re too busy thinking about all our assignments and tests. But every once in a while, my fashionable peers (who magically always have time to accessorize and wear statement jewelry – what sorcery is this?) stress about my outfits and gently remind me that this is the third day in a row I’ve worn that sweater. I try to defend my fashion choices by pulling the typical all-nighter excuse, but the reality is that I’ve gotten used to my lazy outfits and formed a false belief that this is the new norm, at least for the rest of my undergraduate years.
Now, not only do I wonder how I’m going to meet all my deadlines on time, but i also start to wonder how some of my peers can study AND look decent without wearing their U of T pride every day?
4. What a waste of a good outfit! It happens once in a blue moon, but when I DO decide to dress up, look good and feel confident, I end up on a deserted campus. The one day I put in the effort of looking good, no one’s present to witness the amazing results of my studiously chic outfit. Not only are the fashion divas nowhere to be found, but the cute guy in my ECO100 class didn’t even bother coming to class today. It is during these times that social media truly becomes my best friend. There’s no way I’m going to let this historical moment where I decided to put on a skirt go to waste. Let me jump into the #ootd hashtag and embrace my narcissistic self as I take hundreds of photos and pretend that I look this put together every day.
This goes to prove that my fellow U of T sweater-wearers and I are justified for not putting in the effort of looking good.
Ultimately, these rants are written out of distress with the intention of reassuring our readers that their daily experiences are very much similar to the rest of us students. We’re all on this crazy roller coaster, that is university, and we experience the same obstacles in our academic, personal and professional lives. So why not enjoy the ride together?
Sources
http://www.reactiongifs.com/youre-stressing-me-out/
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/1d/6a/69/1d6a6904f77d51deb490e59fa6dc62b8.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Xjzqlkp.jpg
http://media.tumblr.com/57624a49df64c28f7062824a6293fa6c/tumblr_inline_n0jlomx3ju1rver7y.gif