If there is one demographic that fits the phrase “Can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em,” it’s brothers. As annoying and overbearing as they can be, any girl who is lucky enough to have even just one brother (or five, in my case) is given a huge advantage over others who don’t simply because of the valuable life lessons and skills a brother can teach his sister.
Crying is not an effective way to get what you want.
I can recall many instances in which I burst into tears as a youth trying to get my brothers to listen to me or do what I want, but to no avail. I even threatened to run away from home several times, and once I actually followed through with my plan, but when I returned they were unfazed. Typically when I tried this tactic they either laughed or carried on doing exactly what they had been doing before that point.
It is benificial and inevitable to develop a certain immunity to physical pain.
One of my older brothers, Tim, who is currently a Junior living in St. Ed’s, was the catalyst for every trip I took to the ER as a child. The cause of these visits ranged from a broken chin to a gaping gash in my finger because he slammed my hand in the car door (yet again). These were painful experiences at the time, but now I have a diverse array of scars on my body that assure me that I’m strong enough to handle them.
There’s no harm in developing an appreciation and understanding for professional athletics.
Having brothers means that there is always some kind of sports game being watched on the TV. For example, I felt genuine emotional pain when Rondo was traded from the Celtics to the Mavs. I also feel genuine emotional pain when watching a sporting event with other girls and one of them says something wildly inaccurate about a play call, or confuses a fumble with an incompletion.
*Disclaimer: Rick Santorum is not one of my brothers.
Gross male humor can be funny.
I’m fairly certain that movies like Dodgeball, Zoolander, and Black Hawk Down hold little to no appeal for most girls. With a slight exception for Zoolander (there is no one on this earth I hate more than Will Ferrell), when a girl has brothers she understands the humor in these movies enough to enjoy them. Don’t get me wrong, Pride and Prejudice is still a great story, but there’s something about grossly offensive male humor that oftentimes has a stronger pull.
Having a voracious appetite is ~*~impressive~*~.
I feel no shame when I eat 5 or more pieces of pizza at family dinner, and brothers are great because they’ll never make you feel bad about eating like a man. What’s even greater about boys is that they’re generally also more willing to play recreational sports than girls are, so eating huge quantities of food has little to no effect as long as you participate in their games with them. All of us overeat every year on Thanksgiving, but my brothers Brendan and Mike always make sure that every able-bodied member of our family gets outside and plays in the annual Turkey Bowl.
A thick skin and direct attitude are often appreciated.
I’m convinced that no life experience other than being relentlessly teased and expected to take it all in stride does this for a girl. As I mentioned before, crying is virtually useless, so when a bro takes the teasing too far the only thing to do is tough it out, ask them to stop, and move on. Now that almost all of us are adults, my brother Danny has adopted a new form of torment in which he leaves snarky comments on my Instagram posts, but it all comes from a good place (hopefully). Life becomes a lot easier when you’re not affected by every action and word that hurts your feelings. You learn to ask for what you want and be very vocal about how you feel so they can understand where you’re coming from.
Brothers teach you what to expect from a man in a dating relationship.
This may be the most valuable lesson a brother can teach his sister. My two oldest brothers, Danny and Kevin, dated a lot both in high school and at Notre Dame, and consequently have a lot of experience with relationships. Danny was able to see the flaws in my high school relationship much more clearly than I could, and even though I didn’t always appreciate his insights, he was right in the end. They may tease a lot and can be brutally honest, but I know that if it came down to it, each of my brothers would protect me from any serious harm, emotional or otherwise, caused by a guy I’m involved with. Brothers teach their sisters to demand respect from guys and set the standard for anyone who comes along.
So, to any and all of you ladies out there who have these special boys in your life, be sure to let them know that you appreciate them and all that they do for you. And always remember, if you want that last piece of pizza you better be ready to fight for it.
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Images: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 (provided by author), 6, 7, 8, 9 (provided by author)