I’m not going to lie, one of the first things I do when I wake up in the morning is check social media. Did something noteworthy happen in the news I can find on Twitter? Have my relatives tried friending me on Facebook again? More importantly, did somebody post pictures from last night on Instagram? Before we even have the chance to find the answer to this cringe-worthy question, there is no doubt we’re going to scroll by some of these most-dreaded Instagram posts.
1. The Made-Up Anniversary“Happy four months, thirteen hours, and six days baby!! Love you so much!!!” A random shout out to your boyfriend here and there is fine by me, but please stop making up anniversaries. Please.
2. The TBT from Two Days Ago“TBT…. to this weekend LOL!” Latergrams are always acceptable, sure why not! But don’t go trying to pass off a picture from two days ago as a TBT. Save the throwbacks for embarrassing pictures of you in pigtails or with braces, not you partying two days prior.
3. The Upside Down Photo*Most likely captioned with a spiral emoji* Enough of these. What are you doing? Better yet, what am I doing flipping my phone around trying to see your selfie from a normal angle? Save me from my misery and just don’t post it.
4. The Gym Mirror Selfie*flex caption* *people staring in background* If you’re making gains, or want to showcase your body transformation, hey the more power to you! Be proud and be confident. However, if you’re posting a gym selfie at 9 am on Saturday morning, while most collegiettes are deciding what kind of bagel they want… please hold back.
5. The Overly Edited Mess“#selfie #nofilter” You might not have a filter, but holy edits. I 100% support selfies and self-love, so post a picture when you’re feeling hot! No need to edit, you look great before all that. Keep up the selfies, but keep them looking like you.
6. The ‘Caught-Off-Guard!’ Candid“Ugh, Ashley took this when I wasn’t even paying attention! But I kinda like it?! #candid” Don’t lie. We know you made Ashley take this picture. But, hey you do look pretty good, so I’ll just sit here in jealousy I suppose.
7. The #Queen of Hashtags“#sunset #beach #night #summer #capecod #ocean” Honestly, I didn’t need your hashtag-help in figuring out what this picture was. The actual photo and location were enough. So put the hashtags away. Forever.
8. The Health Addict“Yummy!” *bowl of yogurt, fruit, nuts, etc.* How do you even eat that?! Sure it’s very aesthetic I can see that, but your smoothie bowl thing just confuses me and makes me sad. Eat, don’t post. 9. The Shopaholic“Shopping Spree!” This one’s another Insta I just feel pure jealousy for. If your shopping spree consists of two Victoria’s Secret bags, a few from Forever 21, and another from Brandy Melville, you already have my closet beat. Stop making me feel bad.
10.The Love Birds*kissing face emoji* I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: if you want to give some social media love to your bf once in a while, be my guest. Keep the lovey-dovey, and mid-make-out pics to yourself. Plus, who even takes those for you!?