With the turn of the leaves, there is a familiar feeling in the air. The weather cools, the nights get longer, and the hormones go crazy. Â College kids love to call it âcuffing season,â which, according to urbandictionary.com is the, âpeople who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find[ing] themselves along with the rest of the world desiring to be “cuffed” or tied down by a serious relationship.â Normally during this fall-to-winter season, I find myself to feel the same way; wanting a relationship thatâll last through the cuddling weather months. This year, itâs different.
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Recently, I’ve been asked to grab a drink, see a movie, or just hangout to get to know a few fellas and I have denied 90% of the invites. (The only reason there was a 10% approval rate is because it probably involved food, and well, I love food.) Itâs not that the guys that asked me to hangout arenât great people, but itâs that I am not interested, and I really donât feel like wasting my time. Whether it’s avoiding a dreaded DM asking me to go out, or switching the conversation so I don’t have to reply with an excuse, I have skipped out on a lot of opportunities to form relationships. For now, that’s okay with me. (I am sorry if youâre one of those men reading this.) These are the reasons why I am not dating right now:
1. I’m independent and always have been.
A relationship is something I truly enjoy but only a few special people have ever been that dear to my heart. If I’m willing to spend my time and love with a guy, he is a significant someone. Right now, I need to work on myself (clichĂ©, I know). I have some goals I need to achieve and getting into a relationship is not one of them right now.
2. A relationship is so much effort.
I don’t have the time right now, and I don’t have the capacity for any more hurt, either. I don’t want to second guess myself in a relationship or even in the early stages such as talking. I give the other person my all, and I can’t do that at the moment.
3. I’m still heartbroken.
They say it takes at least half the time you were together with someone to truly get over them, so I have another 2 months. I don’t see it getting easier and I don’t want to find a replacement. Like I said before, only a few special people have had my heart and I don’t want just anyone getting ahold of it.Â
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Soon enough, Iâll get back into the dating game, but for now, in the words of Jason Derulo, Iâm ridinâ solo.
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