15 People You’ll See At The Library

1.     The person who has had WAY too much coffee

I can judge you just by the amount of empty Starbucks cups surrounding you… and I’m praying that you haven’t had more than that.

2.    The couple who is on a ‘date’

Keep your PDA away from me… you keep reminding me that the closest thing I have to a boyfriend is my biology paper (and to be honest, we’re probably more committed than you two are). 

3.    The person who’s not in it for the long haul

Your coat is still on and you haven’t taken out a single book. I get it, you have half an hour between classes and didn’t know where to go, but when I can’t find a place to study, and you’re hogging a full table to yourself, you better move. 

4.    The person who brought a blanket

On one hand, I’m applauding you for possibly being the smartest person in the library. On the other hand, I’m concerned with just how long you’re planning to camp out here for. 

5.    The person who brought their dog with them

I appreciate you bringing a therapy dog to me in my time of stress, but if that thing has an ‘accident’ in here I’ll probably lose it. 

6.    The person watching Netflix

My mom was worried that when I went off to college, others would influence me to drink and make bad decisions. Realistically, the only peer pressure I face is watching you watch Netflix, and thinking that I can do it too, instead of writing my essay thats due tomorrow. 

7.    The person who looks way too cute to be in the library

Your cute Pinterest hair style, dress and heels are making me feel bad for using dry shampoo three days in a row and wearing sweatpants, so please leave. 

8.    The person who really needs a shower.

After circling the library for fifteen minutes trying to find a spot, I got so excited when there were six surrounding you. Then I realized it was because your stench was making it hard to breath – never mind study. Maybe they should start selling deodorant in the library’s coffee shop…

9.    The person who keeps asking you to watch their stuff

I’m not even responsible enough to make sure I eat enough vegetables, never mind guard your new laptop, overpriced textbooks, wallet and expensive coat in a room full of strangers. As if my exams weren’t giving me enough stress as is! 

10.    The person who hasn’t studied at all

I’m not one to judge (at least usually), but lets be honest, the only thing I’ve seen open on your computer is Facebook, and your document only has a title so far. Have fun with your all nighter! 

11.    The person looking to get a date

Currently, the only ‘number’ I care about are the ones in my stats assignment. I don’t know why you ever thought it would be a good idea to find your next bae in the area with the highest concentration of stressed, focused and overtired people. 

12.    The person who wants your computer charger, phone, pencil…

The number one rule of the library: always come prepared. Its the survival of the fittest, and I don’t care if my laptop’s at 100%, I’m going to be here longer than you anyways. 

13.    The person crying

Not to be insensitive, because I know school is hard, but do you mind if I quickly ask you some questions and evaluate you? It’s for my psych class. 

14.    The people talking

Honestly, you could be talking about the cure for global warming right now, but the only thing I’m focused on is this essay.  Can you leave and finish your conversation in a Starbucks? 

15.    The person on hercampus.com

Realistically, you’re my favourite person here right now, at least you’re procrastinating the right way! 

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