11 Totally Insane Things Spencer Pratt Has Said About ‘The Hills’ Anniversary

Spencer Pratt is best known as Heidi Montag’s “sucky” husband. The two appeared on The Hills, the hit reality TV show, which premiered on May 31, 2006, and followed the lives of Hollywood hopefuls like Lauren Conrad, Whitney Port and Kristen Cavallari. The MTV-produced ~drama~ was an immediate favorite, bringing with it upon release a loyal crossover audience from its predecessor, Laguna Beach.

Romance, lust, love, fashion and rivalry (really, reality TV at its finest) are just some of the things we remember about the beloved show. But here’s what Spencer Pratt, former Prince of Malibu, remembers most on this, the ten-year anniversary of The Hills.

1. He, like the rest of us, had no idea who Heidi was until she appeared on the show.

“One day I was kicking it at my mom’s house and her friend said, ‘Have you seen this show? This girl’s so cute.’ And it was Heidi.”

2. He wasn’t exactly first choice to be cast as an on-screen love interest for any of the girls.

“I called [the producer, Sean Travis], and he told me it was a set cast from Laguna Beach and he couldn’t get us on. I was like, ‘Bullshit. We’ll see you at the clubs.’ I called Brody and said, “We gotta drop $30,000 on bottles and make a scene at Area next to their table.”

3. Brody was a hardcore prince at the time.

No, really. That’s what he said—word for word.

4. Sometimes, he wishes he had been a professional ballroom dancer—you know, to impress the ladies.

“Heidi is a scary good dancer. And this is when I thought I was Derek Hough. It’s the last good memory I’ve ever had in a nightclub.”

5. Pizza is every girl’s one true bae.

“Heidi and Lauren had this pizza spot they used to go to after the clubs. I swear to god, to this day, I’ve never seen two girls that could eat pizza faster at 3 a.m. I’m talking whole larges to the dome.”

6. Crystals are legit.

After Heidi’s plastic surgery, Spencer, being the loving husband that he is, wanted to make her as comfortable as possible during her recovery.

“I started Googling ‘homeopathic remedies’ and I read this article about Sugilite—this one rock with healing powers. So I go buy a $15,000 chunk of Sugilite, and when she held it, she said she felt no pain. Then I was like, ‘I’m filling the whole bedroom with crystals! I’m putting them on!’”

7. Harry Potter, also legit.

“I didn’t want Heidi to be in pain anymore. I started getting into wands, too.”

8. Illuminati, same.

“I was just like, ‘I need to join the Illuminati, it’s my only chance.’ There was a lot of dark energy, and I was looking for any way to counteract it. You just start getting medieval on shit.”

9. He’s actually a reality TV genius.

Well, he didn’t say this. His sister, Stephanie Pratt, did. But he explained. “We wanted to have a show that people watched, so we did all this stuff that made us look like the worst humans on Earth. When the cameras were off, I was a complete gentleman—opening doors and going to the movies and cuddling.”

10. The Kardashians are in for a rude awakening, maybe.

“If you had asked me right before The Hills ended what I was going to be doing, I would’ve told you, ‘I’m going to be on a reality show for the next 30 years!’ That’s not crazy when you think about the Kardashians. You didn’t think that you could just be turned off. Game over.”

11. In the end, life is all about balance. And food. And tequila.

“I used to have a breakfast burrito every day, but now I have an apple with almond butter, because I want to be model skinny. Then I usually do jujitsu for about an hour and a half, then I eat salmon. Then I go home, ice my old man knees, watch Apple TV, and tweet, because I don’t have any actual friends to talk to. Then Heidi and I will either get sushi or Mexican food and I’ll have some tequila on ice. I keep that in rotation.”

From the sounds of it, things have totally calmed down in the Pratt household over the last decade. In fact, things are so quiet that Heidi has suggested a new spin-off series starring herself (naturally), Kristen Cavallari and Audrina Patridge as new moms.

And we can’t wait to host that watch party.