Whether you are in a romantic relationship or a close friendship, distance becomes a tricky factor in a lot of our lives when we are off to college. However, here are definitely pros, as well as cons, when it comes to long distance relationships/friendships in college. Read these signs to determine if your relationship (romantic or friendly) is worth the hassle.
Effort is the biggest factor into how to maintain a successful relationship/friendship. For example, do you feel like you are the only one taking the initiative to check up on your friend or even plan outings together? Friends who truly want to continue their friendship will make effort to continue it regardless of what barriers come in the way. Distance is little to no hassle if there is an effort to maintain the friendship. The same goes for relationships; does your significant other reciprocate your actions? Do they call you first? Do they ask you how your day is going before you do? These are important factors to consider when evaluating the efforts of people you’re in friendships/relationships with.
If you ever have feelings of doubt, communicating with that person is an important step to take. Sometimes there can be mutual feelings or misunderstandings, and it is best to communicate about them, as opposed to assuming. Assuming almost always leads to negative energy and stress. Furthermore, lack of communication can also be considered another form of distance in a long distance relationship. If there ever comes a time where you have no idea how to communicate with the person anymore, you may be on the verge of growing apart from them. College is all about new experiences and learning more about yourself, so it is bound to happen that since both of you are in different places, you will encounter different experiences that will influence you all in different ways. People don’t always change because they want to. Sometimes they change based on what they experience. Just know that this is okay, and give room for change.
It is not only important to evaluate your relationship based on what the other person is doing. It is also beneficial to evaluate your own efforts! If you are reading this and you notice that some of these patterns describe your behavior, examine your own efforts. What can you do better? Or, maybe you should ask yourself if you even want to do better. It is completely okay to grow apart from someone, as distance in relationships tends to cause this. But don’t wait too long to communicate your feelings to the other person! It is not fair to them to keep holding out on something you do not see continuing in the future.
Effort and communication are essential in maintaining and understanding how your long distance relationship is going. If your long distance relationship is not going how you want it, be sure to evaluate the efforts of both parties. If it is going all well then yay! However, if in your gut you feel that it is not going to work out any more like it used to, then try taking a break. If your relationship falls back into place, then it’s like the famous quote, “If it’s meant to be, it will be.” And if not, you always have your amazing college friends, as well as Netflix and ice cream to support you through a friend or romantic relationship breakup!