Dear future daughter,
We could make this nice and sweet, but guess what, life isn’t always nice and sweet. So I’m going to hit you with a big dose of harsh reality.
1. Boys are stupid. I had to learn this the hard way unfortunately.  My advice to you is to avoid them at all costs – or at least until you’re like thirty and they’ve had the chance to grow up and reach the maturity that you reached like a decade ago.
2. School really sucks but it’s kind of important to your future. Take school and all that jazz seriously or you’ll regret it later (like me). School sucks A TON! It doesn’t get much easier, sorry to break it to you, but it actually gets harder. You just need to hang in there. Put down that remote controlling your Netflix and crack open a book. You will thank me later when you’re making the big bucks and you’re all successful and stuff.                  Â
3. Don’t be dumb. Sure this is a broad statement – but be smart with your decisions. I fully support you having the time of your life but some shenanigans come along with consequences and those just aren’t fun. Not to mention your mom (me) won’t be very happy with you. Have fun but be smart about it. Stop and think before you do anything and wonder – could I get arrested for this? If the answer is yes, don’t do it. The end.
4. Life is going to throw you unexpected curve balls. Things are not going to always go your way in life, but suck it up. Take a breath, wipe those tears, put on your big girl panties and show whoever or whatever who’s boss. Just remember, it will always be okay and things will always end up working out the way they are supposed to. It may suck for the time being but it will get better and I can pinky promise you that.         Â
5. Don’t be a “B word.” It’s as simple as that. There are too many people out there who don’t know what respect is anymore and that’s just sad. People always say “follow the golden rule” and seriously, you should. Treat others the way you want to be treated, be kind, be compassionate and gosh darn it people will like you. And if they don’t, then they aren’t worth your time anyway.
6. Say “bye Felicia” to negative people in your life. Find people who are supportive and who will make you a better person. People who will make you laugh, and most importantly, people who will take care of your drunk butt at the bar. Find those people who have your back through thick and thin, even when you’re being psycho.             Â
7. Love yourself. There are idiots out there who will make you feel you’re not worthwhile, but guess what honey, you are. Say “bye Felicia” to those who aren’t worth it and show them that you matter. You freaking rock and that’s that.             Â
So girl, listen to your mama and follow this advice and your life will be perfect. Just kidding, it won’t but life is what you make of it so make it the very best you can!