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Boys or Besties?

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at St Vincent chapter.

A Collegiate’s Guide to Navigating Relationships While Not Losing Herself in the Process.

Picture this: There’s a boy who is unlike any other you’ve met before and he’s suddenly just appeared in your life. You don’t know why or how, you just know that he is and you want all that he has to offer. You find yourself quickly getting caught up in his friends and his life and slowly without realizing you’re losing yourself. Next thing you know, you’re hearing it from all ends about how you’ve changed or how you’re spending less time with those who love you and came before. You find yourself stuck between a rock and a hard place. So, what’s a girl to do when she’s not just lost in love but is lost with her own sense of self? Here’s some tips on how to pick up the pieces when things come crashing down. 

Balance is key. 

Finding the right balance between work and play is always a tricky thing. When in a relationship, it’s hard sometimes to make time for you, your significant other, and your friends. Try making plans through the week as opposed to last minute so that you don’t accidentally step on toes or overbook yourself; spreading yourself too thin. 

Remember who you were before.

Everyone was someone before they met their special someone. It’s important to remember the person you were before you got in a relationship, so that you can shine and show your significant other the beautiful person you already are more fully. Be sure to try to spend time with your friends who can help keep you feeling your best self.

Know your intentions.

What do you want out of your relationship? If you aren’t sure about what you want, then you won’t be able to put your best self forward in the relationship. Spend some time being honest with yourself so that nobody ends up getting hurt in the process! 

Set boundaries. 

Know how far you want to go and don’t let anybody pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to do. Having besties in your corner to help you whenever times get rough is absolutely essential if things start not going as planned. Remember to stay true to who you are and if that boy doesn’t respect that then be strong enough to recognize that they just aren’t the one for you and you deserve much better.

Make time for you. 

Treat yo’self! Making time for you to relax and simmer down is the perfect way to unwind and regroup after a long week. 

Enjoy!

Relationships should be fun! Just remember to be yourself and enjoy each other’s company. Never try to force anything, because if it’s meant to be it will be. It’s a really cool thing to have besties and your boy on your side; but, just remember when boys aren’t there besties remain. Now go out and be awesome collegiates! 

-HCXO

Lisa Mason is currently a Junior Marketing major with a minor in Management. She is a member of Activities Programming Board, Women in Business, Singers, and works as an Admissions Ambassador at Saint Vincent College. Since she has a passion for meeting and helping others; she hopes to use her field of Marketing to become a professor as well as become a Marketing Manager of a firm someday in a major city. You can find her enjoying time with her friends, drinking salted caramel cappuccinos, or blogging. Also, it wouldn't be the craziest thing in the world to say that she is a Netflix, caffeine, and retail therapy enthusiast. Follow her on Instagram: masonjar_17 and check out her blog at http://youngandtwenty.blogspot.com/.
Juli Cehula

St Vincent '18

Hello there! I am the Campus Correspondent of the Her Campus chapter at Saint Vincent College. As a senior psychology major, I've made the most of my time in undergrad and am excited for all the doors I have opening ahead of me. I can definitely thank Her Campus for giving me invaluable skills. As a future psychologist, I hope that my articles (and the chapter's) are able to make you feel empowered, motivate you to start a conversation, and be kind. As a hero of mine has said, "If you do not take control over your time and your life, other people will gobble it up. If you don't prioritize yourself, you constantly start falling lower and lower on your list."- Michelle Obama. Be the change you want to see in the world, and smile. Always smile!