Ouch, my newsfeed has been on fire with political arguments which has really put a damper on things. Regardless of which side you vote, I think we can all agree that this election has been a hot mess and we all need a little comic relief to keep from crying. So, why not tell the some of the highlights of the election season from our favorite hot messes, the characters of New Girl.
It’s a delicate time in our country and we must find a candidate that is prioritizing the right issues.
My favorite part of election season, is going back home to Nebraska when people from my hometown ask what side of the election I’m on.
Or when the coveted, “three things to not bring up at dinner” rule is broken and suddenly everything tastes like sadness.
How the first message reads that we send to a handsome Canadian lad when trying out Maple Match, the dating app that aims to save Americans from the unfathomable horror of a Trump presidency.
As the election season has gone on, both candidates have accidentally become more transparent, reminding us all what a confusing decision we have to make.
First, the Hillary Clinton scandal in which 30,000 emails went MIA began to raise questions for Americans.
And then Trump called out billionaire philanthropist Warren Buffett by saying that Buffett took massive deductions. Soon thereafter, Mr. Buffett released his tax return that indicated he made $2.85 billion in charitable contributions. That’s a lot of money…
Right before our eyes, the first debate was upon us. In case you missed it, here’s a quick synopsis of what you missed.
One of the most memorable one liners of this debate is when Donald Trump questioned Hillary Clinton’s stamina and she replied by saying, “As soon as he travels to 112 countries and negotiates a peace deal, a cease fire, a release of dissidents, an opening of new opportunities in nations around the world, or even spends 11 hours testifying in front of a congressional committee he can talk to me about stamina.”
After the first debate, a few issues came to light such as the sniffles and Trumps argument that a defective microphone contributed to him losing the first debate.
In the days to come, the election season took a turn for the interesting when the 2005 recording of Donald Trump became public.
Of course, after a PR faux pas such as that, Trump had no choice but to make a public apology for his words which sounded a lot like this.
But in reality, this is what a lot of us actually heard when he apologized…
Time flew and the second debate arrived which proved to be the most entertaining debate by far but this time, I made sure I was accordingly prepared.
When the debate started without Trump and Clinton shaking hands, I knew it was about to get real.
The two candidates cut straight to the chase in this town hall debate without skipping a beat.
Trump threatened to have his attorney general investigate Hillary’s email case and throw her in jail. She didn’t say it out loud but we all know what she was thinking…
Trump also displayed some interesting characteristics during this debate including, creeping behind Hillary as a tactic to intimidate her. This is what we all needed him to do because that tactic was so bothersome…
Additionally, Trump also continued sniffing for the 542357989 time. We probably wouldn’t have to negotiate our debts with other countries if we had a dollar for every time there was a sniffle.
In the midst of the sniffles, my heart went out to the moderators who were attempting to reign in both candidates.
And so the debate pressed on, reminding me of how I feel about the character of both candidates.
Trump was asked about the issues only to leave us with more questions about his plans than answers.
Trump then made his best effort to define “stuff.”
Then when I thought the debate couldn’t get any better, Clinton and Trump were asked to say something positive about each other at the end. They both pleasantly surprised me by actually having an answer. Clinton gave Trump kudos for how his children turned out and Trump applauded Clinton for her willpower to never give up. Cheers to them both for putting aside their differences.
With spoilers like these, I can’t imagine what the final debate and election will hold.