In the world of online dating; Tinder has become the most popular dating app for millennials. Most of us, for the most part, have had a Tinder profile. Regardless if you used it for hook-ups, friends or finding potential boyfriends/girlfriends, Tinder is an experience. From the extremely funny or forward profiles and the even more forward messages, Tinder can be totally overwhelming, but for Aeja and I, we are Tinder Queens. We’ve dealt with every type of boy/man on Tinder; the awkward guy, the straightforward, the douchebag, and the over sexual guy. Let our experiences help you navigate through the magical world of Tinder.
Angelica’s Experience:
I downloaded Tinder my sophomore year of college. I had heard about it through friends and decided that I needed some sort of internet validation. On the first glimpse, I was shocked at how forward some of these guys were. Some of the most common messages I received when I lost my Tinder Virginity was the following: “You should sit on my face so I can eat my way to your heart.” I am telling you, that was the most repetitive message I had ever received.
But, Tinder has this great block feature that you can utilize in order to block those straightforward individuals who make you entirely uncomfortable. I quickly learned that this wasn’t an app made for any type of committed relationship. I happened to meet two of my short term boyfriends on Tinder, though, so it was good for a hot second. I’ve had the awkward guys who are super cute but don’t know to have a conversation. Those guys always disappoint me. But the ones who frustrate me will be the undercover straightforward guys. This guy who we will name Harry (because I don’t really remember his name, also goes to show you how serious I take this app) and I had a GREAT conversation spanning over a couple days. We talked about school, our families, our goals and what we wanted out of life. Totally and completely down to earth guy. It was great… until the third or fourth day we were talking, he asked me the most disappointing question ever: “So, when are you going to sit on my face?” After the most intellectual conversation I had on Tinder, HE TURNED TO ASK ME THAT. I was so shocked, I blocked him.
After that experience, I learned to expect absolutely nothing out of the guys on Tinder. I have talked to the most douchey guys that I can smell one from a mile away, it’s a blessing and a curse. Tinder has taught me how to recognize when guys are talking out of their asses and how to catch the secret douchebags. Tinder is not for the faint of heart nor the girls who expect to find their Prince Charming. Because let’s face it, Tinder is not the place. Tinder is the place where you learn how to be a savage and get a little wild *wink*. (But like remember to be safely wild).
Aeja’s Experience:
If you asked me if I would have used Tinder my freshman year, I would’ve laughed in your face. I downloaded Tinder my sophomore year of college like Angelica. My freshman year of college I had gotten out of a relationship with my high school boyfriend, who also happened to be one of my best friends. I wasn’t feeling the dating scene my freshman year and focused more on getting through my first year of college.
My sophomore year is when I felt I was ready to step back into the world of dating. No one told me that college dating was tricky, especially when your college is a huge commuter school. My sorority sisters told me about Tinder and I was skeptical. I heard how it was mostly for hook ups and that was not for me since I wanted a relationship. I made one because really what was the worst that could happen. Tinder was a whole new ball game for me because unlike meeting someone the traditional way; you had to make yourself seem desirable from your profile pictures to your bio, but I mean who really reads those.
Like Angelica, you will receive the most forward messages like this message I got: “Daddy wants f*ck you”. You better believe that dude was blocked and reported in less than 30 seconds. I personally am not a fan of Tinder and hopped to a different dating app called Bumble, where the girls have to message first, so there’s a 50/50 chance you’ll actually talk to someone if they respond back. When you meet the guys in person, some are just like when you talked to them online, while others are a**holes.
Online dating apps and I have a bittersweet relationship. I was the kind of girl who probably shouldn’t have joined Tinder or Bumble, like Angelica said, because I had the mindset of Prince Charming is going to come knock on my door or well in this case swipe right on me. The dating apps like Angelica taught me to not expect a lot from guys because let’s be real dating in this day and age is not a fairy tale. It’s not to say that relationships can’t happen because I have best friends that are in happy relationships with guys they had met from either Tinder or Bumble. I’ve just learned now to go with the flow and see what happens when it comes to dating apps.
Angelica and I aren’t here to promote Tinder or Bumble because advertisements can do that on their own. We’re here to just tell you our experiences. Dating apps are not meant to lead to your fairytale because if you go in with that expectation, then you will be in for a rude awakening. If you go on dating apps, then just go with the flow. You cannot and I repeat cannot predict what will happen with someone. Yes, it would be wonderful if we were like Raven Baxter and could see into the future, but unfortunately, we cannot. We’re in our 20s and it’s the time for us to live our lives. It’s okay to have a hoe chapter because if someone slut shames you for it, then they can go kiss your ass. It’s okay to be wild and a bit reckless, but obviously be safe and smart about it. Do what you want whether it is to find a relationship, a friend, a friend with benefits, one night stands etc. because guess what it is your choice. Don’t lower your standards and don’t dwell on guys that aren’t worth your time. Remember you’re a gem and well they’re just the dirt beneath your feet.