When I was in high school, everyone had an opinion on “those couples.” You know the ones. The couple who seems to be joined at the hip, who hold hands in the hallways, go to every school dance together, and were Facebook official since the dawn of time.
Towards the end of my high school career, everyone wondered what these couples would do after graduation. Are they gonna break up? Or would they miraculously stay together? Either way, I felt bad for them. I knew that when it’s time to apply to college it seemed like the world was stacked against their relationship. Throughout my college career, I heard about the fates of these high school sweethearts. And if I’m honest. almost all of them ended badly.
So there’s the million dollar question. Should you follow your significant other to college? Should you even discuss college plans with a high school S/O? It’s a difficult question but there’s an easy answer.
You should never limit yourself because of another person. I’ve seen a few of my friends and heard about people who were stuck in a college they hated because they followed someone to college. At the end of the day, the pressure of following someone to university and keeping a relationship alive actually strains a relationship. If you have an opportunity or if you have your heart set on a school, you should go there. Period. If someone loves you, truly and wholeheartedly loves you, they wouldn’t limit your chances of success. Likewise, if you truly love you S/O, you shouldn’t be the end all to them finding the college of their dreams.
If you happen to go to the same college as your S/O, there is no reason to break up. Instead, you should have an honest conversation about college options with them. Without communication, there truly is no relationship. You should have an honest conversation about what you are doing after high school. If distance is an issue, you should have another conversation about your plan to keep your relationship alive or if it comes down to it taking a break.
The only couples that I know of who stayed together after going to the same college had a foundation of trust and boundaries. They allowed the other to have social lives that didn’t revolve around their significant other and was still able to have the college experience. The key to a relationship surviving the transition of a high school relationship to a college relationship is trust, boundaries and mutual respect.
If you’re worried about your relationship as you transition into college, make sure that you try to communicate as best as you can. Be smart, be open-minded, and be realistic about your future.