Last week, our community celebrated Mental Health Awareness Week, and even though the week is over, we should still be working to end the stigma all year long. If you’re someone who struggles with your mental health, you know that your battle doesn’t stop there. Ending the stigma is a continuous process of listening to those with stories to share and learning how to be an advocate.
I’m someone who has struggled with mental health since high school – going in and out of routine therapy sessions whenever things got tough. It wasn’t until I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa after my freshman year of college that I really began to take my mental health seriously.
That year felt like I was falling down a rabbit hole, plummeting deeper and deeper into a frenzy of self-destructive habits, and when I finally awoke from what felt like a fever dream, I had realized what a mess it had made of my life. My energy and my spirit were simply run down to the point of extinction, while my mental space was littered with disordered thoughts that controlled everything I did. Fortunately I was able to get help, and since my diagnosis I have slowly but surely begun to heal my relationship with food and my own body.
I consider myself lucky to have gotten help when I did, and I will always be grateful to those who helped pull me out of the darkness. But that doesn’t mean it’s gotten easier being a college student with an eating disorder, especially since college campuses practically act as a breeding ground for diet culture. However, through the trials and tribulations of treatment, I’ve come up with some solid coping skills that have made my college experience infinitely better. So if you’re feeling stuck in a life controlled by your disordered thoughts, hopefully these tips can help do the same for you!
1. Reach out for support
This is a crucial first step in healing your mental space. Not only has this helped me connect with a therapist and registered dietician, but it has created a stronger relationship between me and my circle of friends and family. I know that taking a leap of faith and trusting a loved one with your personal thoughts and feelings can be daunting, so take it slow and thank yourself for being vulnerable – I promise it will be worth it in the end! Just remember that people aren’t mind-readers, so be vocal, and ask for what you need. I find it advantageous to create a list of things that they do that are helpful and unhelpful to your successful recovery, that way they can know exactly how to help you make progress.
2. Remember that food is not the enemy, neither is your body
The challenges of ‘fear foods’ and negative body image can be paralyzing. These are things that certainly won’t be fixed just because you read this article, but through thoughtful and supported attempts to correct these behaviors, you can expect to make progress! For me, eating a challenging food that I perceived as ‘bad,’ meant incessant guilt trips and anxiety. The truth is, food has no moral value. You aren’t a bad person because you eat pizza or chocolate, just as you aren’t a good person for eating a salad. Nevertheless, the emotions that can come from stepping outside of your diet comfort zone are bound to be strong. I chose to cope by eating with people I felt comfortable around, distracting myself with non-food related discussion, and sometimes playing games during mealtimes. I find I have more easily found peace with food than with my body, but that doesn’t stop me from fact checking myself when I have a negative thought about how I look. Think about what you would say to a friend that expressed a negative body image thought to you, what would your response be? Tell that to yourself. The end goal doesn’t have to be loving your body or your appearance, but rather, appreciating it for all that it does to keep you alive and healthy.
3. Cleanse your social media
Not kidding, taking this step changed my life. I spent so much time internalizing messages from toxic pictures, posts, and ads on social media that I didn’t even realize were bad. These messages are not only incredibly misleading, but are harmful to anyone who reads them. They don’t just affect someone with an eating disorder, they also promote the disordered behaviors that can send anyone down a slippery slope of unhealthy habits. To be clear, yes, this includes the Instagram influencer trying to sell you flat tummy teas and their “30 day shred” workout routine. Content like this is so pervasive that it can seem impossible to ignore, but the good news is there is an entire social media community working to promote anti-diet wellness and body acceptance! Here are some of my personal favorite accounts to name a few:
@whollyhealed
@jennifer_rollin
@i_weigh
@theintuitive_rd
@dietitiananna
4. Practice saying ‘yes’
Being amidst the clutches of an eating disorder can keep your schedule revolving around your disordered behaviors. I often found myself saying “no” to dinner with friends or going to social events because they involved food and I was afraid I would miss a workout. That being said, the best way that I was able to reincorporate all kinds of foods and fun into my life was by saying yes as much as possible. Isolating yourself is one major symptom of eating disorders, and that’s what makes them thrive in secrecy. Not only will saying yes to these things help you create stronger relationships, but it will help make food seem less scary. Spending all of your time and effort thinking about what you eat, how many calories you are allowed to consume, or how often to hit the gym, is exceptionally exhausting. What’s worse is that it takes away your energy from what truly matters in life; friends, family, school, and your future goals. Consider this when trying to correct an eating disorder behavior. Although there is no doubt it will be a challenge, remember to surround yourself with friends and family to support you every step of the way, and use them as motivation for recovery.
5. “Ride the wave”
This is a term that I learned when I was doing my intensive treatment program. When you’re battling eating disorder behaviors, it can be terrifying, stressful, and extremely uncomfortable. These emotions come at all different levels of intensity, but the most important thing to remember is that they will pass. Defying the eating disorder voice in your head can make its false promises and demands seem even louder, so when this happens, it’s normal for your emotions to take over. What I’ve learned to remember is that an emotion is just “energy in motion,” so when they hit hard, ride that wave all the way down!
Photo Courtesy of Ellie Kinney
Mental disorders like these can seem intimidating, and they have a tendency to make us believe that we are responsible for our own suffering. Sometimes they tell us that we aren’t “sick enough” to deserve help. Mental Health Awareness Week’s purpose is to combat these ideas, while bringing an end to the stigma around those who struggle. It is incredibly important to bring these issues to light, so I encourage you to share your story. It might just inspire someone else to do the same. Understand that everyone deals with mental disorders differently. Someone else’s experience will never be exactly like yours, but that doesn’t mean we can’t still be there for each other. I hope these five tips can combat the beliefs you may be battling with, and in case no one has told you yet: you are worthy of getting the support you need, you are not alone, and you have and always will be enough.
For more information and resources, head to https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org