As college students, we are no strangers to an environment of suppressed emotion. College environments tend to favor cold logic and reason over authentic emotion. Professors and administrators alike tend to discourage emotional language when discussing poignant topics and issues. They seem to believe that emotions make an argument invalid and have no place on a college campus. I disagree.
First of all, suppressing emotion is a feminist issue. Emotion is seen as a traditionally female trait, which is why it is not accepted in most “professional” atmospheres. Some feminists see the entire American court system as biased towards men because of its suppression of emotion.
Emotion isn’t inherently female, but women tend to be criticized more for it than their male counterparts. If a man expresses emotion he is applauded as being “sensitive” and sometimes feminist for merely being authentic. Women, on the other hand, are called “emotional,” “over-sensitive,” and “moody” when tears are shown. Sometimes they are even asked the dreaded period question. Even tears are more accepted than female anger. When a man shows anger, he is merely acting in accordance with the situation and is justified. When a woman is angry, she is being “over-dramatic” and should calm down. There is nothing wrong with emotion. Emotion is not synonymous with irrationality. Emotion can motivate and express better than words. Showing emotion is not a weakness — it’s a strength. Showing emotion proves that you aren’t afraid to be your authentic self. Of course exceptions exist (see the Kim Kardashian example above), but I believe most people are rather rational when it comes to emotions. One thing I’ve noticed is most women will say “sorry” before expressing any emotions. They act as if sharing their turmoil and feelings makes them a bad person. There should be nothing taboo about expressing yourself. Feeling frustrated over a professor, feeling angry at your boyfriend, feeling sad about your pet fish dying…all of these things are perfectly acceptable. Expressing emotions doesn’t mean you are weak. Telling people about how you feel isn’t a burden. Relationships actually become stronger through self-disclosure, so don’t be afraid of being your authentic self, emotions and all. If someone isn’t in a good place to listen to your problems they’ll tell you.
People compound the suppression of female emotions by labeling them “first world problems.” When people say that you’re dealing with a “first-world problem” they are insinuating that your feelings are not valid because there are those that suffer more. This is saying, or those like it, have been used for centuries to keep the oppressed quiet. Women, why are you so angry about not being able to vote? Just be happy you are in America and have any rights at all! Why are you going to the Women’s March to protest Trump? Don’t you know that there are women in third world countries that are killed every day? By invalidating your feelings society is attempting to silence you in order to maintain current power dynamics. If a child starts crying because they’re getting bullied, you wouldn’t tell them about starving children in Africa. That would be absurd. The same goes for everyday conversations. There is a time and a place for everything, and talking about the woes of the world isn’t great when someone is hurting. Even in 2019, women still have to fight to feel as if their feelings are valid. In a society where female anger is dismissed as “overreacting” and women’s concerns are dismissed as “first-world problems,” it is more important than ever to validate women’s emotions. In the future, we need to stop treating women’s emotions as a weakness and start prioritizing them as a strength. The future of the feminist movement in part depends on it.