That girl who sits in front of you in Calculus with the bounciest ringlets? That boy whose hair reminds you of Timothee Chalamet? They’re keeping secrets from you — secrets that hold the key to their beautiful, curly hair. Behind every head of perfect curls is an hours-long hair routine and dozens of products that hold the key to envy-worthy ringlets. Obviously, keeping curly hair curly is more hard work than fun-and-games. Read on for five things curly people wish straight-haired folks understood about what goes into maintaining our perfect locks.
1. Coconuts. Coconuts. COCONUTS!
Notice that every time a girl with curly hair walks by, you can practically smell the coconut rolling off of her. Don’t get me wrong! I love the smell of coconuts. SheaMoisture’s coconut and hibiscus curl enhancing smoothie never did me or my curls any wrongs but it seems like every single curly hair product has some sort of coconut oil or extract in it that just sets us apart completely! Sometimes, I just want to smell like papayas! Or mangoes! Maybe coffee? I’m not sure! I would love some variation in there.
2. Which of these 15 products shall I use today?
Thanks to the natural curly hair movement, there’s been a bunch of products released for curly hair. Each claim to have the best effects! Each one says that the more products you use, the better the results. Each product accomplishes something different. There’s one that makes hair shine, another that increases volume, another that’s anti-frizz, and that one over there which increases curl retention. You need all of them to make it work! Maintaining our hair with shampoo and conditioner is already hard enough. Deciding which combination of products to use just makes it harder!
3. There shouldn’t be that many zeroes on my receipt…
Now that I’ve addressed that we use so many, let’s talk about how crazy overpriced they are! Devacurl, an excellent brand, charges $30 for an 8 oz. bottle! I took the curl quiz on their website and they prescribed a $100 hair routine for three 12 oz. bottles.They know I’m going to need more than that! They know I have to mix and match brands! Most women with straight or wavy hair spend $11-$20 per product and use 2 in an average wash. It doesn’t take that long nor is it as difficult to maintain as curlier hair. Not to mention that products that cost less contain a lot of silicones, parabens, and sulfates, which are huge curl-killers. You have to pay so much just to have great hair.
4. Wait, I have to pay SHIPPING?
Yes! As a matter of fact, most women with curly hair buy their hair products online. Most people with straight or wavy hair can buy their hair products at a pharmacy, drugstore or supercenter like Walmart or Target. However, curly hair products have very small shelf space in any of these stores. Even then, they’re usually off brand and the section is so much smaller. When I was at Target the other day, the curly hair products were under a special section called “Textured Hair Care.” And although I could find one or two, maybe SheaMoisture, Blueberry Bliss or Miss Jessie’s, we all know that we have our own very specific special concoctions just to get the right look. Even then, our hair has a mind of its own. You could do the exact same thing on two different wash days and end up with two different results. This means that in order to get these very specific special products, we resort to the… Internet. And yes, on top of that $100 hair care routine, there’s $5.99 shipping.
5. Harmful Chemicals
I know I touched on this a little bit already, but I feel like it deserved its own rant. Although a lot of products are converting to more natural ingredients like extracts and oils, there are still a lot of harmful ingredients that go into making your hair shine. Some of the preservatives aren’t natural and end up harming the hair more than helping it. Any product that uses the word “fragrance” on the list as anything other than the last ingredient most likely has a “secret concoction” of harmful chemicals that end up causing gradual damage as you continue to use it. Chemicals like phthalates and Trideceth-6 have been banned in other countries but green-lighted here in the United States because of how little they are used. To get those organic ingredients, you have to pay more for expensive brands.
So yes, the life of a curly girl or boy is quite the life indeed. Yes, there are so many treatments that could just end it all and make it straight but why would anyone want to do that? In all honesty, that hard work pays off. Curly hair is powerful and beautiful and I want nothing more than a two-hour wash day to turn heads as I’m headed to class with perfect curls.