I compare myself to others way too often, you would think I hate how my life is going, but I don’t and that is the problem.
I know this is an issue that a lot of people face whether that is comparing themselves to other people’s looks, money, career, routines, relationships, you name it. People forget to celebrate their own accomplishments because they feel like it is not enough. They also think they are always falling behind or skipping past something. I am one of those people.
Social media only heightens this. As an Advertising and Public Relations major who works heavily in social media, I agree that social media has detrimental effects on our mental health. I also believe that it is our reality and it is not going away. Society should shift how we use the platform to make it beneficial for the public good, but that is a topic for another day.
When it comes to social media, I never noticed myself comparing girls’ bodies or looks to my own. For me, it was more about their relationships, where they traveled to, and their ultimate lifestyles.
I find myself jealous of the experiences they lived while I am in bed viewing it. It makes me question what I am doing wrong, even if it is nothing. When I see people my age traveling to exotic places with friends, going to multiple concerts a year, and having perfect routines, I start to ponder why this couldn’t be me. Am I capable of doing these things? Yes. But is it realistic? Probably not.
I have a consuming fear that I am wasting my life away. My mind is at a cycle of comparing what others are doing at this age. Am I falling behind?
Surprisingly, the worst social media app when it comes to comparison for me, is LinkedIn. Like Instagram or Tik Tok, nobody is going to post the disappointing moments in their life. LinkedIn is filled with all the accomplishments and achievements people have made, but in their career: new internships they accepted, awards they have received, positions they have upgraded to. I love seeing and celebrating other people’s job offers and milestones, but it doesn’t stop me from relating it to my own career.
Now, I am just as guilty as the next person when it comes to posting on the app. I update my LinkedIn regularly, share my internship work, and post travels on my Instagram. I don’t expect people to stop doing it just like how I won’t stop. But I will notice the feelings that result from it.
However, the problem does not solely stem from social media. Regardless of if social media exists, it happens in real time, real life too. People could be telling their incredible, lively stories about visiting their dream places or me just seeing the difference in productivity, and the comparison can kick in.
The weird thing is that this makes me seem like I am miserable with my life. But it is the opposite. I love my life. I like the college clubs I am a part of, I feel loved by the people in my life, and I feel I am making progress in my career field. But then I wonder, is there something I am missing? Should I be doing more?
I obviously always can be striving to be the best version of myself, but when do I know if I am doing it for myself or if I am doing it to live up to others.
It is a self-battle of thinking I am either falling behind or not living to my full potential. I don’t want to always be comparing myself to others and where they are at in life but it is hard to stop. Comparison has its way of constantly interrupting my life and it is impossible to get rid of.
Am I only 20 and need to appericate where I am? Or am I already 20 and need to live up to what others are doing at this age?