As the fall season approaches once again, our to-do lists, Pinterest boards, and FYPs remind us of all the cute, autumn themed activities we have to try. Just like every other fall-obsessed girl out there, I look forward to the pumpkin patches, scary movies, haunted houses, baking, and picking out my Halloween costumes. I’ve loved doing these activities ever since I was a little girl, but now, the fall season brings more bittersweetness than expected. This is because for Gen Z girls and women, it now feels like fall is contingent with being in a romantic relationship.
I don’t know when spooky season became such a male-centered idea. In the last week alone, I’ve heard the same phrases said by completely different girls:
“I need a boyfriend so I can go to a pumpkin patch.” “I wish I had a boyfriend so I could have cute couples costumes.”
This isn’t to slander those who yearn for a relationship. My problem is with those who believe happiness and festivity can only be achieved when a man is involved. Why has social media convinced us that we only want to go to a pumpkin patch if we have a boyfriend to post with? Why is it that we can only look forward to dressing up if there’s a boy we get to match with?
A huge reason we’ve adopted this mentality is because of social media platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and Pinterest. Everytime I see a cute post of a couple cuddling and watching scary movies together, or baking cinnamon rolls in their pajamas, it reminds me of the fact that I don’t have that this year. However, this is such an easy mindset to get over. I may not have a boyfriend currently, but I do still have things to be eternally grateful for. I have amazing friends who invited me over to their apartment to bake brownies. I have a roommate who’s become my best friend, and now we’re planning our matching ladybug and bumblebee costumes. I have my sorority sisters who’ve planned scary movie marathons and trips to the pumpkin patch.
My hope for whoever’s reading this is that you don’t let your worth this season be measured in your romantic relationships. Social media makes it so easy to compare ourselves to others, and makes us automatically think we’re less than if we don’t meet certain criteria. This season, remember that there are so many amazing memories that can be made that don’t have to involve a man. No matter what your romantic life looks like right now, enjoy every memory regardless, and happy spooky season!