There is a certain kind of music that just gets you.
Maybe you are walking to class with your headphones in, getting ready in your dorm room, driving home late at night, or sitting in the library pretending to study. Then a song comes on, and suddenly the lyrics feel a little too personal.
Welcome to the world of ‘’sad girl music.’’
From Phoebe Bridgers and Gracie Abrams to Sienna Spiro, Olivia Rodrigo and Olivia Dean, ‘’sad girl music’’ has become a huge part of the way young women connect with music. The term is often associated with heartbreak, relationships, overthinking, in the feeling of being lost. But the new generation of artists under these labels are showing that their music is about much more than sadness.
It’s about growing up.
So, What Actually Makes a “Sad Girl” Song?
At first, the answer seems pretty simple: emotional lyrics, a little bit of heartbreak and maybe a song that you should probably avoid playing when you are already in your feelings.
But “sad girl music” has grown into something much bigger.
These artists are singing about complicated parts of being. They talk about romantic? relationships but also friendships. They talk about heartbreak but also confidence in a way. They talk about loneliness but also self-discovery and learning about how to become comfortable with yourself.
That is what makes the label interesting. “Sad girl” doesn’t necessarily mean unhappy, sometimes it just means being honest.
The Soundtrack of your Teens and 20s
College is full of moments where you’re figuring out things as you go. You are making new friends, losing old ones, navigating relationships, worrying about your future and trying to figure out who you are becoming and what you want. Some days you feel confident and excited about what is ahead. Other days, you have no idea what you’re doing in life.
There is a song for both.
You might listen to Olivia Rodrigo when you’re feeling dramatic after a questionable text. You might turn on SZA when you are trying to make sense of a relationship, reminding yourself of your worth or just simply sitting with everything you are feeling inside. And maybe Sienna Spiro is playing while you walk across campus, headphones in, completely in your own world.
Music becomes part of your everyday life.
It’s not always about Heartbreak.
One of the biggest misconstrued conceptions about ‘sad girl music” is that it’s always about romantic relationships. Of course, heartbreak is a big part of it. But there is something deeper happening in the songs.
They give young women a space to talk about emotions that are not always easy to explain. They explore what it means to miss someone, outgrow someone and question yourself, want more for yourself or just simply not know what comes next in life.
Sometimes the music is not even about something that has happened to you. You can just connect with the feeling. That is the beauty of music: you do not have to have the same exact experience as the artist to understand what they’re feeling, you just have to recognize them.
Maybe the problem is the word itself.
Calling this entire group of music “sad girl music” makes it sound like the women who are listening are constantly miserable but that could not be further than the truth. You can listen to a heartbreaking song while being completely happy. You can cry to a song and still have a good day afterwards. You can relate to music about loneliness while being surrounded by people who love you.
Feeling deeply does not automatically mean feeling badly.
If anything, the popularity of these artists shows how much young women want music to feel honest. Somewhere we can be confused, emotionally and somewhere we could admit that we do not have everything figured out.
And maybe that is why “sad girl music” continues to resonate so much with women. It gives us permission to feel things without having to fix it immediately. There’s something about hearing someone put your feelings into words you couldn’t. Maybe being a ‘’sad girl’’ isn’t about being sad—it’s about letting yourself feel everything.