I’m halfway finished with my last semester of college, and I feel completely stuck. I don’t have a post-grad job lined up that’s related to my major; I’m procrastinating doing all of my homework until the very last second before it’s due, and I don’t feel motivated to start the career that I’ve wanted so badly for myself. What makes this even harder to deal with is my doomscrolling addiction, in which everyone that I follow on social media seems to be doing just fine in all of these categories. I’m 21-years-old, shouldn’t I have some sort of plan?
This dilemma is something I’ve talked to my friends and family about a lot within the last year, and I’m certain that they’re sick of hearing me rant about it. I get the same responses: “You’re so young,” “You have time,” and “Nobody actually knows what they’re doing.” If my loved ones are reassuring me with these comments, why do I feel so behind? There’s people my age posting their accolades on LinkedIn. How come I didn’t get that award? There’s people my age posting their vacation photos on Instagram. When am I going to be comfortable enough to travel?
I just feel like everyone has it figured it out except for me. I know that this could not be further from the truth, but it’s how I feel. A friend told me recently about how impressed he is by me and that he looks at me as an example. When he said that, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, because I feel the same way about him. To me, that was a reminder that maybe I am doing just fine. I still have a lot of life to live, but because this is such a transitional part of my life, it feels uncomfortable.
Despite this reassurance, I still often ask myself, “Does anyone know what they’re doing?” I say this in an attempt to have someone figure out my life for me. The hard yet beautiful truth of that is “no,” no one knows what they’re doing. Everyone’s life is their own to figure out. During this time in my life, I need to remember that. If the choices I make are different than what someone else would do, that’s okay. This is the age where you’re supposed to make mistakes and have fun while doing it. With social media being so prevalent in today’s society, sometimes it’s hard to recognize other people’s mistakes and it’s easy to think they have it all figured out. However, it’s important to realize that people are more attentive to their own actions than they are to yours, so live the life you want to have.