Ah, April. The month of Easter, spring break, April Fools and so much more. We all think of Easter eggs, the last full month of classes before finals kick in, and the long wait towards enrolling for the fall semester. Or for seniors, the ever-growing excitement of graduation and finally wrapping up the year.
For students, it’s the panic of “What did I really learn this semester?” For others, it may be the looming dread of having to go through another four weeks while being burned out.
April is a fast month, already deep into the new year. Or at least it feels like it is. And at some point, the question of “what have I been doing this year” is still a bit over our heads.
So what should I do? Well that’s all going to change today with some honest journaling thoughts on how to and why it’s okay to slow down on an April morning.
The Pressure to Rush
At this point, classes expect more than just work. There is an expectation to speed up, keep going, push through. Sound familiar?
The problem is when this turns “keep going” into “no stops.” We live on a campus where classes run fast, tabling is at an all-time high (again?!), and when rest does come, it manifests in the form of shame. Shame in not completing an essay. Taking even a quick break to spend time with friends feels like betrayal.
That’s when April, a month that should be about refreshment and reveling in the colors that come with spring, becomes a little more dull.
What Slowing Down Is
In the last month, I’ve learned that slowing down isn’t actually about procrastinating. It’s not about slowing down. It isn’t even about refusing procrastination and locking in for eight hours. It could look like taking a walk. Catching up with a friend. Spending some time journaling about your thoughts, even if they feel like pouring out your feelings in poetry.
Slowing down is slow, but being slow isn’t the same as being counterproductive. Counterproductive is refusing to acknowledge your needs. Think consistently putting off a deadline because you want to do it later. That is counterproductive.
It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy in short. One where it feels like you need to rush, out of urgency and overwhelm, to cram what would take a day down to one hour.
What Getting your Groove Looks Like
The phrase “getting your groove back” seems cheesy. I agree. But it does matter.
Burnout isn’t exhaustion. Writer’s block isn’t a nadir where I’m clumped on a desk wondering what is the point of making more art. Disconnect isn’t being physically away.
I used to believe these misconceptions for so long and I still wonder how they’re deconstructed.
The reality is that disconnect is actually being mentally absent. Thoughts are a part of us, and they drown out the things that mean more to our daily lives. They gatekeep us from asking about our routines, the things we feel like we want to do but can wait even just an hour.
It might even look like this: “Today, on an April afternoon, I was going about my business talking about things that didn’t revolve around anything really. In the end, it felt like I had suddenly connected with myself again.”
You don’t need to reset your life and you don’t need to have everything decided by the end of April.
An Honest Reminder: April, It’s Okay
You’re not behind. Not because a professor said or because your planned deadline didn’t come as expected.
April can be full of comparisons, anxiety, responsibilities, and wanting to escape it all. I know. I even have a snapshot of what life has been lately. And most of it is a blank page. But not every page is a snapshot of what you’re doing.
Spend some time to pause, to simply relish in what makes being part of being able to work mean something. You may get there even if it’s late. So maybe if you’re exhausted like I am, tell yourself: “I’ve got this. April’s got this. Let’s slow down for a second.”
What are some things about April that you’ve learned? Any thoughts on these kinds of shower thoughts? Let us know at @HerCampusSJSU!