Journal Entries of a Freshman in College

Over the last month, I have started journaling. I have wanted to do this since basically forever, but I have just never actually sat down and done it. I blame that  on me being extremely type A, so starting anything new has to be perfectly planned out and set up before I can actually start it. But I finally decided to just allot a time every night for me to sit down and write down any random thoughts I had throughout the day. I approached it as if I were texting my best friend to make it more fun and less like formal writing. This made it so much more fun and less like a chore to me. After looking back at the entries and the titles I came up with for each, I noticed that a lot of them have to do with college and the newness of all of it. So I decided to pick out ones that stood out and that I thought would be relatable to other freshman college students. 

First Experience with a Bad Professor

This professor is going to make me go insane. Tell me why we are three weeks away from the end of the semester, and she has only one out of about ten assignments graded. The withdrawal period is long gone now, but I have no clue where I even stand in the class. She gives us minimal feedback on rough drafts and then expects us to be confident with our final drafts. Don’t even get me started on her teaching style and class expectations. I literally love writing so much, so I felt confident going into this required writing course, but I think I might actually fail just based on her attitude towards the class. She definitely has favorites, people who talk to her and expand on her points, but sorry, at 8 am in the morning, I don’t feel like explaining my thoughts on ethos, pathos, and logos. Now that I have had 5 absences, she is requesting that we have a meeting to discuss why I missed…send help. I already know she’s going to be extremely passive-aggressive, but it’s the end of the semester, so I just have to get through it, I guess. 

Why Does It Feel Like I’m Living Two Different Lives?

Every time I go home, it feels like it’s still the month it was when I left the last time. I wonder if this feeling ever goes away because it’s literally like I’m living two different lives, but I’m not, because unfortunately, I don’t get any extra time than I had before college. Imagine how amazing that would be, like double lives, with double the amount of time. It’s always weird going home again because even though nothing has really changed, there’s always that little something that just feels different. I think it’s the fact that it’s not really my home anymore if I’m there less than I am at school. Other people say that it’s the people that make it a home, maybe this is just my materialistic side, but for me, it’s the things, the surroundings, environment, the east central/middle of nowhere Pennsylvania of it all, just the uniqueness of it. The fact that I can drive down my road and there’s about ten different people I am related to, the endless backroads, that there isn’t a major retail store less than 30 minutes away, no townhouses or ugly developments, and my small high school with only 70 people in my graduating class. I say all the time that I want to settle down in a more bustling area when I have a family, but I honestly don’t think I could ever not call my town my forever home. 

Group Projects Should Not Be A Thing In College. 

So I got assigned a group project in my media class. This isn’t my first group project in college, but it better be my last. Tell me why my one group member decided to just ghost us three days before the project was due, never reply, not do any work, but still get the same grade as the rest of us?? A week before the assignment was due, we each discussed what part of the project we would complete. She got the first part and the most important one. Mine was the last part that needed to be done, so when I didn’t hear anything about the progression of the project, I decided to reach out to my other group members. Everyone but her replied, leading us to have to quickly complete the project ourselves. I really didn’t think group projects would be a thing in college since it’s not like you see these people every day, like you would in a high school setting. I just don’t think it’s fair that people who are paying for their own education should have to do other people’s work. 

Should I Feel Sad That My Freshman Year Is Ending?

Every other freshman I have talked to is like so distraught that their first year of college is over… am I the only one who’s not? This year has been really fun but also a really big change, and I’m really just excited to get back to my usual/old life. Summertime is when I come alive. It is my favorite season for a reason; I love it so much. So with that in my mind, I’m just ready to move on to the next year and so on. This is probably because I tried not to get super attached to my dorm, and honestly, even some friends I made. I feel like this is good and bad because yeah, I’m not crying about leaving my beautifully decorated dorm, but I also am not as close with people as I think I could have been. It is what it is… time for hot girl summer!

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