Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
NCSU | Life > Experiences

For Anyone Feeling Lost in College

Kendra Heiser Student Contributor, North Carolina State University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at NCSU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

I graduate from NC State in a couple of weeks. Although I am excited to start a new journey, I can’t help but think about how I got here. Of course, I wish I had done some things differently, but if I had, I wouldn’t be where I am today, and for that, I am completely grateful. 

Everyone says college is the time to find yourself. But the truth is
 I spent the first year and a half trying to be someone else. I was constantly trying to “fit in.” I thought I needed to be more southern, more preppy, more religious. But really, instead of finding myself, I was losing who I was. 

Freshman year, I kept waiting for opportunities instead of going out and finding them. I wouldn’t go to things if I didn’t have someone to go with. I kept seeing my friends from high school posting with new friends on social media, and I remember thinking everyone already had it all figured out. I thought I was the only one scrolling on my phone on a Wednesday night because I didn’t know anyone to go to the frat wine night with. I had thought everyone had already made their friend groups, and that was it. That was how it would be for the next four years. How naive was I? 

In hindsight, my biggest regret of college is not leaving my room more. Being too afraid to do things on my own left me closed off from so many opportunities. I don’t know why I thought I would be judged for showing up somewhere alone, but looking back, I can’t believe I felt this way. Everyone is in the same boat as you are. 

So, my advice to you is
 

Don’t stay in your dorm. There are so many opportunities that come with being a college student. Use them. Use the facilities, go to the craft center, join clubs, play intramural sports, sit with new people in the dining halls, explore the town around your campus, go to your college’s sporting events, or simply do your school work outside or in your campus library. Countless possibilities are waiting for you outside, but you have to be okay with leaving the comfort of your dorm walls to find them. You never know who you will meet or what you will find when you aren’t sitting in your room. I can’t count the number of times I walked around campus in the four years I have been here and stumbled upon a campus or club event. From Free Moms to Shack-a-thon to Pause for Paws, NC State always had something going on. If I hadn’t left my room, I would have missed them all. 

Once I graduate, I still might not be able to say I’ve found myself, but I’ve found opportunities, amazing friends, and more confidence in myself and my independence.

My point is
 everyone feels a little lost at first. The difference is what you do with that feeling. You can let it keep you in your room, or you can use it as a reason to get outside and explore the opportunities your campus has to offer.

Kendra is a senior studying marketing with a minor in English at NC State. She was born and raised outside of D.C. in Alexandria, Virginia. She is passionate about women's health and mental health issues. She enjoys fashion, concerts, sports, music, movies, and good books. She particularly loves playing volleyball and is the captain for her intramural team at NCSU. Additionally, Kendra loves to travel and meet new people, and enjoyed her spring ‘24 semester studying abroad in Spain. She is now a Pack Abroad Ambassador, a part time nanny, and a volunteer for the University Theatre Costume Shop. Kendra currently works as an intern for Targeted Victory on the corporate team, marketing for fortune 500 companies. She previously had an internship working for Sothebys International Real Estate and loved her experience there.