If I had told my thirteen-year-old self that I now choose to spend a night with my parents rather than hang out with all my friends, I would’ve never believed it. As I grow older, I continue to change and learn new things about myself that constantly surprise me. Here are three of the biggest and most important lessons I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older.
Hanging out with my parents is cool
The number one thing that would’ve shocked my younger self is how much I value spending time with my parents. After moving out my freshman year and into a dorm, I found myself coming home far more than I could have expected, even declining plans with my friends just to spend some extra time at home. I find so much comfort and joy sitting on the couch, cuddled up with my dog, watching whatever hockey or football game is on, and just spending time with my family. I wouldn’t have imagined how much I’d grow to value and cherish family time.
Not only is spending time with my parents one of my new favorite things, but I’ve also started learning how much I value their opinions and advice. I find myself calling my mom for just about everything now. When I’m faced with a problem, the first people I turn to are my parents because I’ve found that they’re honest, drama-free, and overall want the best for me. I’ve finally come to the conclusion, after all this time, that my parents might actually be pretty cool.
Spending time alone is essential
In high school, I always found myself surrounded by friends, walking through the hallways, hanging out, and even doing homework; I was rarely by myself. Sometimes I even spend time with people who weren’t great friends just to avoid being by myself. When I look back on most of my high school memories, and even my freshman year, I don’t remember much alone time at all.
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned as I’ve grown up is to value alone time just as much as I value time with others, if not more. Although it seemed scary at the time to have to do some things by myself, I see the importance of it. As I’ve grown, I’ve learned to appreciate those moments alone. I’ve found peace in taking a solo walk or doing homework in the library completely by myself. Coming to UMass Amherst as a transfer student, it was so uncomfortable having to do things alone, but in the end, it only changed my habits and myself for the better.
LEARN TO BE MORE COMFORTABLE IN YOUR OWN SKIN
The most important part of my growth has been becoming comfortable and confident in my own skin. In middle school and the earlier years of high school, I was constantly insecure and self-conscious about even the smallest things. I worried about how I looked and how I acted, and I compared myself to everyone around me.
Over time, though, I’ve learned to let go of that constant pressure, and I’ve accepted myself for who I am. Comparing myself to others and putting myself down has brought me nothing but misery and sadness. I’ve come to realize that true confidence comes from being authentic and comfortable with myself. I’m now more aware of my negative thoughts, and I try to stop them immediately when they start. Although it’s still a process that I have to consciously put effort into, I’ve already seen such a difference. I can only thank time, experience, and maturing for my shift in mindset. Having more confidence has made me a happier person than I’ve ever been.
Growing older has changed me in ways I never expected and has helped me discover what truly matters as I continue to learn who I’m becoming. Realizing that my parents are actually pretty cool, learning how to do things on my own, and becoming more confident are just a few of the many lessons I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older.
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