Before this semester, I wouldn’t have called myself a writer. I tried poetry for a while in high school and stopped when I decided I was bad at it. How could I possibly claim to be a writer if my writing wasn’t good? I figured it was a reasonable enough conclusion and I didn’t consider that maybe being bad at writing is a starting point, not the final destination. This semester, I found myself with extra time and ended up signing for a poetry workshop on a whim. I didn’t think much of the decision but its been so fulfilling. I’ve been writing my poems and my articles for HerCampus and it has given me this outlet for my creativity that I didn’t realize I needed. It has also pushed me to put more effort into writing at all, even when it feels unfamiliar or difficult.
Letting it suck
Not all of my pieces are good, and actually a lot of them suck, but I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter. The biggest struggle I had was believing that if my writing wasn’t immediately spotless, I was just doing it wrong. I would get stuck trying to make everything sound spotless that it led to so much frustration. What I have learned though, is that writing is not meant to come out clean or polished. Writing something that feels awkward, half-done, or unfinished is always the first step. It is almost liberating to realize that, allow yourself to be messy and figure out what it is that you want to say. I’m coming to understand that being a writer isn’t about avoiding bad drafts, but being willing have them and keep going.
Revising the Mess
Revising has been the least straightforward part of writing to me. There is never only one way to make a piece better. I thought at first it would be just cleaning up sentences or working on grammar, which it can be, but my poetry workshop has shown me so much more. I’ve been shown that revising can also mean experimenting with your work, like playing with form or reworking the imagery. Approaching your own written works by detaching from what you think is perfect is hard, but being open to trying new things and seeing what happens is beautiful. Feedback can be a part of that process, but its not necessary to follow every suggestion. The main thing I do with feedback is use it to understand how others are viewing and interpreting my work. Revising is messy in the same way drafting is, but writing is an ugly process no matter what. It will never become cleaner, but as a writer you learn to get more comfortable working through the mess.
Write!
Your writing will never feel as good as you want it to, and that is the harsh truth. Maybe it won’t fully match what you imagined or maybe there is something you could say better, but that doesn’t make it pointless. If you keep working through the bad drafts and the uncertainty, it becomes satisfying in a different way, not because it’s flawless but because you stayed with it long enough to create something real. In that way, your writing will outlive you, quietly proving that the effort is always worth it.