Misogyny, like Frankenstein’s monster, IS ALIVE!!! I will say I am quite shocked at the bluntness with which it happens nowadays. I could write about how hurtful it is to be treated differently for something that I cannot change, but alas, I think that point has been made for a couple of centuries now. What I will do instead is tell you the things that have been said to me throughout my teens and young adult life. Why not share the wealth!
“She’s wearing pants so tight you could read the date off a penny in her back pocket” 0/10
Years ago, I was in the middle of completing training before officially becoming a hospital volunteer. Our advisor was telling us the general expectations when he said he had specific advice for the girls: make sure not to wear tight pants. He then said there was a saying back in his day that was, “She’s wearing pants so tight you could read the date off a penny in her back pocket.” Safe to say the silence was really loud after that and generally ruined the vibe, so 0/10.
“Neuroscience doesn’t really apply to women and children, you should stick to bio” 5/10
I was being talked at by a classmate about his academic and career goals when he turned the question back to me: what I wanted to do. I mentioned I was majoring in Biology, was considering switching to Neuroscience, and would like to work with women and children. That’s when he hits me with a crazy one-liner (and unsolicited advice), “Neuroscience doesn’t really apply to women and children, you should stick to bio.” In his defense, it is an accurate statement. It’s not like women and children have brains or anything! His advice was so ridiculous it turned funny, so 5/10.
“I’m not a woman but if I was…” 2/10
Before I begin this story, I cannot stress enough that this class was not a gender and sexuality class.
I had a class with a reading I could only describe as erotica, which, surprise, did not apply to the class’s content. When the professor asked for our thoughts on the reading, he stared at me, since he had heard me say how little I thought the reading applied to the class. So, I said just that. He did not agree in the slightest bit; in fact, we started a back-and-forth about how the reading blurred the lines between exploring sexuality and over sexualizing young women. He then said, “I’m not a woman, but if I were…” and continued to defend the author’s writing choice.
I want to make it abundantly clear that writing, reading, or consuming media with this kind of content is not inherently inappropriate for academics. It can be used to explore other perspectives and vulnerable topics that enrich learning when it applies to the content being taught.
After that discussion, he thanked me for bringing up the topic and, for the rest of the semester, he would leave it to another group when it was my turn to speak during table discussions. He gets a 3 for the back-and-forth discussion that made me feel like I was arguing at the dinner table again, but -1 for faking me out with the thank you.
overall
Let this be a lesson: don’t be weird.