It sounds like “Redemption” playing loudly by Drake, everyone else is being toned out by your emotions at that very moment, and worst of all, you’ve missed 4 assignments this week– all because of heartbreak. Buckle your seatbelts, ladies and gents, cause you’re about to walk through the three phases of healing and heartbreak, maybe grab a few tissues while you’re at it!
Being away at college on your own gives you a new sense of adulthood. You’re allowed to make decisions on your own; no permission granted or denied.
Phase 1: The start of a rollercoaster
It’s the start of a new school year, and everyone’s waiting for the canon events to come to their doorstep. You’ve known your future partner for a while, whether it was through mutual friends or being in the same classes. The thought of finding a college love story is what ignites people’s passion to discover their inner lover, whether girl or boy.
Phase one feels light. You never feel guilty for sneaking into their dorm because it just feels right–even when you’re technically not supposed to be there. It’s about the excitement of constantly checking every notification on your phone, hoping it’s from them, and when it’s not, it can turn your whole day sour.
And let’s not forget the note in your Notes app with all your favorite things about them, trust me, I know! Every story somehow circles back to “my person.”
The bare minimum typically means way more, whether it’s being walked back to your dorm or letting them use your meal swipe just to eat together. You’re happy about what this is beginning to be, feeling like there’s nothing that can top it!
Phase 2: The weary feeling of being on the ride
All of a sudden, focus is lost. How are you supposed to lock in with academics when all you can think about is whether there’s a new person in the equation? This is the kind of math one can prepare you for. Checked their social media? Stalked their locations? Even tell your friends you’re done with them, when we all know that’s not true– at least not 100%.
If you guessed right– Here comes Phase 2!
The feeling of resentment and time being wasted is starting to pile up; there’s no going back now.
Feeling like you’re losing yourself, huh? This phase usually gets the best of people. You tell yourself that relationships just take work. That is what growing up looks like. But somehow, there’s still a gap within this love bridge.
Worst of all? The ends through text. No warning. No real conversation. A few lines on a screen truly do change your perspective on everything.
phase 3: Time for acceptance
Heartbreak is the start of phrase 3. The need to find closure is what’s hurting you most. Questions begin to rise– Why me? What did I do wrong? How can I fix it?
Even better– you resent your partner too, and it changes the way you view everything. The memories don’t feel as warm anymore. The moments you once cherished start to feel heavier.
But the strange thing about heartbreak in college? Life continues to move on; you can either decide to move with it or be stuck in the same place you once were.
At first, you wait for an apology to fly in, you think of ways to run into them just to feel an emotion from once before. But as days pass, you realize there’s so much more in store for you. Things are beginning to shift, organizations are flowing through you, and the academic pressure is now turned into success.
It’s where you start to realize that healing comes in so many forms– venting, dancing, music, or even journaling. In times like these, we realize that it’s okay to go through all the motions, from love to heartbreak. It shapes you in various ways that lead to success.
Growth shows up in moments like these.
In the end, you realize college love is worthwhile. Whether it’s a lesson learned, a memory to cherish, or an experience that helps you grow, it leaves its mark on who you are and who you’re becoming.