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Chapel Hill | Life

Green Flags & Red Flags in College Friendships

Anaya Andre Student Contributor, University of North Carolina - Chapel Hill
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Chapel Hill chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

We’ve all experienced the college friendship epidemic. The transition from people who have known you your entire life to befriending anyone you come in contact with can be daunting. One thing that has kept me going over the years is being able to spot red flags in friendships early on. 

The Summer I Found My People 

We can see this in the all-time favorite show, The Summer I Turned Pretty. In this show, Belly and her best friend Taylor are the epitome of a “ride or die”. No matter what chaos occurs. 

1. They push you to be the best version of yourself. 

College is often a time of self-discovery. Finding friends who will encourage you to grow as a person is crucial during your university years. Your closest friends influence the decisions you make and have the power to shape your journey in ways you might not even realize. 

2. They appreciate you for you. 

Good friends embrace the good and the bad. In college, friendships can often be surface-level, and genuine connections are few and far between. It’s important to find “ride or dies” who appreciate you wholeheartedly. Friends like these last a lifetime. 

Best Friends Never 

Now, on the flip side, some friendships are not worth holding onto. Identifying red flags early on can prevent you from investing in people who don’t have your best interest at heart. 

1. They can’t handle your success. 

Many friends are there for you when things are going downhill, but disappear the moment you start winning. This phenomenon, known as success envy, stems from insecurity and jealousy that gets projected onto your success. A true friend will be your biggest cheerleader, but a fake one will prey on your downfall. That is a red flag you can’t ignore. 

2. They only reach out when they need something. 

Oftentimes, friendships are one-sided, and you may find yourself giving more than you’re receiving. Time, energy, and effort are investments you can’t get back. If your friend only shows up when it benefits them, it’s worth asking yourself if they’re really your friend at all.

Navigating friendships can be difficult, but they’re also worth it. Finding a group of people who support and uplift you can truly make your college experience unforgettable.

Anaya Andre

Chapel Hill '28

Anaya Andre is a second year honors student at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. During her time there, she is pursuing a double major in Business Administration and Media & Journalism. Currently she is a social media manager for Launch It Marketing Agency based in South Florida. She is also an active member of her university's Marketing club and Black Christian Ministry.

Anaya founded "Promote Her, Period." (PHP) as a nonprofit organization in 2022 with the mission to promote and empower young women while creating a support system to embrace and understand their feminine journey. PHP has already donated over 5,000 feminine hygiene products and is working to expand into local high school chapters. Beyond her nonprofit work, Anaya also serves on the Dean of Arts and Sciences Committee, where she contributes to discussions that shape academic and student experiences at UNC.

Her third and most important aspect is her faith. Anaya is a current member of the nonprofit organization, "Girls In Christ" which helps girls grow in confidence, Christ, and community. Anaya is also a part of UNC's Black Christian Ministry and is actively seeking opportunities to edify herself and her community. With a passion for storytelling, leadership, and service, Anaya continues to seek opportunities to create meaningful impact in every space she enters.