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The Heart Behind Every Gift: A Love Language in Action

Chrisella Cordero Student Contributor, University of California - Los Angeles
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UCLA chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

In the spirit of the holidays, it’s officially the season of giving. The time of year when gift lists start forming in your notes app, group chats debate White Elephant rules, and Secret Santa assignments suddenly feel way more serious than expected. Maybe you want to be the most fun or creative person in the room. Maybe you’re trying to make sure your Secret Santa gift actually feels thoughtful. Or maybe you’re completely clueless about what to get in general.

For me, gift-giving isn’t just a seasonal obligation. It’s actually my love language. The heart behind every gift matters. Being a good gift-giver isn’t about the price tag, extravagancy, or perfection. It’s about intention, listening, and showing someone that you truly see them.

One Thing They Actually Want (Plus a Little Extra)

If it’s reasonably within budget, I genuinely love getting someone the actual thing they’ve mentioned wanting, even if it was said casually, months ago. There’s something special about showing that you were listening. That said, I almost never stop there.

I may be a little extra, but I like to add a little extra love in the form of smaller items that show care and thought. Snacks they love, tiny trinkets, self-care items, or something cozy. These additions aren’t meant to overwhelm; they’re meant to show, I thought about you beyond just the main gift.

@lifethru.angie

Burr Basket for my 17yr old sister🎀🎁❄️ #burrbasket #giftbox #christmasgifts #giftideas #gifts @Posh Tech @rhode skin @Victoria’s Secret @Coach @Pillsbury @Glow Recipe @apple @Gisou @LOCCITANE @Urban Outfitters @THE OUAI

♬ original sound – Angie🫧💕

Personalized, Just for You

Some of the most meaningful gifts are the ones that feel like they couldn’t belong to anyone else. Personalization doesn’t have to mean expensive; it just has to be intentional. Something with their name, a customized detail, or even an arrangement (like flowers or colors) that isn’t commonly seen but feels so them.

These gifts stand out because they feel chosen, not generic. They say, This wasn’t picked randomly or last minute, this was meant for you.

@alysilverio

give the gift of something custom for the holidays with the help of @Etsy! AD #etsycreatorco #etsytiktok #giftguide #giftsforher #giftideas

♬ Jazz Coffee – 寿司娘

Baked With Love

When gift-giving isn’t an option, or when you want to add something heartfelt, baked goods really do speak for themselves. Making something from scratch, putting in the time, decorating it thoughtfully, and packaging it nicely shows effort in a way that store-bought items sometimes can’t.

It’s not just about the final product; it’s about the care that went into it. And honestly, food made with love always hits differently.

Add a Little Silly

I’m a big fan of the gag-gift-before-the-real-gift moment. It sets the mood, breaks the tension, and brings out genuine laughter. Maybe it’s something they absolutely wouldn’t want. Maybe it’s confusing. Maybe it’s the classic lump of coal.

That moment of confusion or laughter makes the real gift reveal even better. It shifts the energy and reminds everyone that gift-giving can be fun, not just serious.

A Collective twist

Sometimes, gift-giving doesn’t have to fall on just one person. One of my favorite twists on gifting is turning it into a shared, collaborative experience. Think of it as a gift for everyone, made possible because everyone contributes.

Instead of one person buying a single gift, everyone brings something small for each other. On its own, each item might feel simple, but together they become something thoughtful and full of love. It’s less about impressing and more about creating a shared moment, showing that gift-giving can be collective, intentional, and wrapped with love from many hands.

@beckperezz

10/10 recommend a small gift exchange ✨ the girlies did good 🎀

♬ Cheryl LynnーGot to Be Real – ⓜⓔⓛⓣⓨ

Practicality Over Clutter

Sometimes, the most thoughtful thing you can do is not add to someone’s clutter. If you know someone already has too much of something or not enough space, consider a gift that’s actually useful.

Practical gifts can still be meaningful. Something that helps organize their space, makes daily life easier, or supports a lifestyle change shows that you’re thinking about their real needs, not just aesthetics.

@malburford

PRACICAL CHRISTMAS GIFT IDEAS UNDER $25❤️🎅🎄 for the person who has 100 candles and could use something helpful in their life!! #practicalgifts #christmasgiftidea #holidaygiftguide #louisvillekentucky #louisville

♬ original sound – MALLORY BURFORD

My Own Thoughts on Receiving Gifts

Personally, I love gifts that show someone truly knows me. Maybe it’s the shoes I mentioned once, but never expected to receive anytime soon. Maybe it’s something I’ve been needing but would never go out of my way to buy for myself. Maybe it’s the blind boxes or books I’ve been obsessing over, but I didn’t have the money to get.

More than anything, I love knowing a gift was handpicked. That someone put time, effort, and intention into choosing it. That kind of care is felt immediately, and it’s what makes a gift unforgettable.

At the end of the day, being a good gift-giver isn’t about impressing anyone. It’s about love in action. And when a gift comes from the heart, it shows the wrapped intentions.

Chrisella is a fourth-year at UCLA majoring in Biochemistry and minoring in Society and Genetics. During her free time, she can be found lost in a book with her matcha, creating Spotify playlists, obsessing over her 90s and 2000s rom-coms, watching musicals, trying new food places, and exploring LA! You can catch her going to photobooths at least once a month.