According to my birth certificate, this year, I’m officially turning 21. While reaching this new milestone is exciting, part of me still feels 18, and another part of me feels 79. I’ve always loved my birthday and the promise of getting older. I feel like the more you grow up, the more thrilling the pinnacles you’ll achieve. I’m just recently entering the dressing room of young adulthood and trying on new costumes, but here are some of the things I’ve learned along the way.
- The Little Things are Always Worth Getting Excited About
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With the amount of work and deadlines that are always so present, it’s sometimes hard to stop and smell the roses. Sometimes we get so consumed with everyone else’s achievements and the fear of falling behind, we spiral because of it. It’s okay to be proud of the little things. Getting more steps in, reading a new book, or even making countdowns of special days. Life can come at you pretty fast. The small wins shouldn’t be glossed over.
- You Won’t Always Be Happy or Sad All the time. It’s Okay Just to Be Content
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I always thought that in my life, it was essential to have one strong, prevalent emotion. I was either super happy with how my life was or super sad over a minuscule detail. I don’t think emotions should be exact in that way. My life has calmed down in more ways than one, and I’m appreciative of it now. No good comes out of erratic emotions. Sometimes, the best thing to do is just be okay with nothing. Contentment is a pedestal you should always hold up high.
- The Unwanted Noise Holds No Real Value
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Something my mom always told me was, “Those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter.” It’s so easy to let someone’s opinion of you take over your perception of yourself. Social media, especially, can lead to a strong inundation of negativity. You only have so much room in your life to give into bad energy, so make space for what serves you. An off-handed comment of a passerby has no real value to your relationship with yourself. The number of comments you get on an Instagram post shouldn’t be the deciding factor in your self-esteem. You know who matters in your life, and it’s up to you to decide what kind of value system you want that will support you the best.
- It’s Okay to Make Mistakes and to Own Up to Them
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Let’s cut to the chase, being prideful and stubborn helps no one. You’re going to be wrong at some point in your life; you can’t blow up at people just because of that. Life isn’t measured in the number of arguments you’ve won or the apologies you’ve received for a role you played in hurting someone. It’s essential to take a step back, assess a situation from their eyes, see how you might’ve hurt each other, and forgive yourself for any mistakes you’ve made. Life can’t be wrapped in a neat little bow with specific answers. Sometimes you’ll hurt people, and people will hurt you. What matters is what you choose to do. Forgive them, and forgive yourself.Â
- Be Comfortable in SolitudeÂ
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For someone with two siblings, I love spending time alone. I think the times when I’m truly alone are when I’m happiest. FOMO can be a major feeling, especially when you’re young and have so many opportunities at your disposal. But a forced Saturday night will never be as fun as staying in and being comfortable. Striking a good balance between the quiet and the loud is the best way for you to find your footing, while still reaching out. As much as I love a girls’ night out, I won’t fight a cozy movie night.Â
If I were to flashback to 16-year-old me, she would’ve thought being 21 was so grown-up. I know I’ll look back on my 20s the way I look back on my teenage years. Cringing and proud at the same time. I don’t think I’ll ever want to go back to being a teenager the same way I’d like to go back to being a young adult. As I begin this new chapter, it’s comforting to know I’ve only just started trusting my gut and knowing that I’m more than enough.
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