When people think of college culture, casual dating and hook-ups likely come to mind. The fact that people in college are busy, trying to figure out who they are and trying to figure out what they like, can lead to a lot of messy relationships. Some of these may include hook-ups. Let’s take a deeper look into the hooking-up with no string-attached type of relationship.
I’m not sure anyone besides the occasional and emotionally unavailable Chad would argue that hook-up culture is a good thing. Maybe a one-night stand now and then never hurt any healthy, consenting adult, but is it the best option for young people growing into themselves to grow up with? The obvious answer is no, and I believe that holds to be true.
Hook-up culture reflects how transactional our society has become. We feel as if hooking up, whatever that may mean to a person, can simply be a mutual exchange, a detached action. It’s one more thing we’ve learned to compartmentalize.
But we can’t avoid what’s at the core of hooking up — connection. Kissing, making out, having sex… these are not detached or emotionless acts. These are things you are supposed to do with a person you care about. And if you are hooking up with someone you don’t feel deeply for, ask yourself why you are sharing a connection with a person you don’t care deeply for. Does it have to do with them, you, someone else, or the situation? Either way, it doesn’t seem emotionless, even if the emotions aren’t love.
In conclusion, you can never truly hook up with someone without any feelings. Whether those feelings are good, bad, mixed, complicated, confused, frustrated, hurt, or buried, it doesn’t overlook the fact that these are emotions. So the next time you start to think a hook-up could be detached, meaningless, or without feelings, I ask you, is it ever really casual?