Entering the world of female friendships on screen is a rite of passage of girlhood. As a professional binge-watcher and connoisseur of women-led sitcoms, Girls is an absolute must-watch. The 2012 HBO show written by Lena Dunham revolves around four college friends Hannah, Marnie, Jessa, and Shoshanna, and their challenges of relationships, work, and self-discovery as post-graduates in New York City.
What makes Girls so good is its authenticity. The characters are deeply flawed, lacking self-awareness and constantly self-sabotaging their relationships. They’re young women navigating an unguided world at a vulnerable and unpredictable time in their lives.
While as college students, we still have some time until we become some form of Girls, the show comforts the current time in our life— as we are finally growing comfortable holding the title of “being a woman”, all while being expected to know what “being a woman” means already. We are self-discovering at a rapid pace through questionable relationships and new experiences, under the pressure of turning our passion into a way of living. It’s a time of many thoughts and many actions, sometimes chaotic and isolating.
Although I plan on rewatching Girls when I graduate college, and I expect to have an entirely new perspective on the show, here are some lessons Girls has taught me in my first watch.
Experience all that you can
In season 2, the main character, Hannah shares that she wants to “feel it all.” She says that she’s been taking in all her experiences, always putting her feelings to the side and she’s gone through them all impulsively in an attempt to find herself, but it’s just left her feeling lonely. Hannah teaches us to “feel it all,” but also reflect on it all. You will never be who are right now, in this exact moment, and that’s something to take advantage of. Planned fun is the worst kind of fun, so don’t let anything stall you from adding to your collection of human experiences.
You don’t need to be in love
On the topic of experiences, you don’t need to be in love all the time. There’s so much more than that bad date, or that bad breakup. Sit outside with your friends on a sunny day, play your favorite music, and don’t talk about people who don’t deserve the time. That’s where the real love is.
Passion is all we have
Passion is natural and instinctive fuel for living. Without it, existence is incomplete. Maybe your parents are down your back, telling you to study something you are completely uninterested in, or they love using the phrase “starving artist.” Whatever. Write your dreams down and keep them close. Don’t doubt what you want, passion will keep you alive.
Your plans will fall through
Think about who your younger self thought you would be. No way you were right. Think about who you were a year ago. You’re not the same. So much happens day to day that no matter how certain your future feels, it is completely unpredictable. So, take the risk now, forgive yourself later. Trust that things will fall the way they’re meant to, and not the way you want. Â
You do not need to be the “voice of your generation”
In the pilot episode of *Girls*, Hannah rushes to her parents with an unfinished manuscript after they tell her they will no longer be supporting her financially. Desperate and uncertain, she declares, “I think that I may be the voice of my generation… or at least a voice of a generation.” If Hannah is *the* voice, she’s an authentic one—navigating dreams of being a writer, struggling to pay rent, and managing messy relationships. But through it all, she’s living, and her experiences are shaping her perspective. In a way, we are all “a voice of a generation.” We don’t have to be *the* one; simply by living, learning, and loving, we become a voice for those around us.